


Derby Girl Deanna

by magicalmuser



Category: Supernatural
Genre: F/F, Femslash, Genderbending, Roller Derby, Rule 63
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-11-22
Updated: 2014-11-22
Packaged: 2018-02-26 13:45:24
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 22,075
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2654195
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/magicalmuser/pseuds/magicalmuser
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>One weekend they piled into the Impala and drove to a nearby city to watch their first banked track roller derby bout. There was something addictive about being surrounded by hundreds of people who considered strapping wheels to your feet and skating in circles trying to block each other the pinnacle of competitive team sports. All Deanna knew was that the track was where she wanted to be.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Derby Girl Deanna

**Author's Note:**

> A huge thank you to my artist [asylumbound360](http://asylumbound360.livejournal.com%22). She did a wonderful job with the [artwork](http://asylumbound360.livejournal.com/3477.html) for this fic. I'm still fangirling over the fact that out of all the DCBBs this year she picked mine!
> 
> Another big thanks to [b3takitten](http://b3takitten.tumblr.com) for beta-ing for me last minute. What a trooper. Any leftover mistakes are entirely my own.
> 
> Disclaimer: I've never actually skated roller derby. I don't even know how to skate. Everything I learned was from my friend who started roller derby and tried to get me to join with her, and the [Women's Flat Track Derby Association](http://www.wftda.com), whose website I learned a lot from and took great liberties with. Their website does a really great job of explaining the basic rules of roller derby, and I highly suggest going to watch a derby bout if you ever get the chance. It's probably one of the funnest sports to watch, and the atmosphere is awesome.

Deanna’s obsession with all things derby began in none other than Bobby Singer’s garage one hot summer afternoon the year that Sammy left Sioux Falls for Stanford. Deanna was supposed to be looking for a tool Bobby needed, but his organizational skills were indecipherable to anyone but him, instead Deanna found herself rummaging through a cardboard box with faded marker on the side. That’s where she found a pair of old roller skates, the kind with the four wheels arranged in a square. Deanna didn’t even know if they still made skates like that.

The urge to try them on was only exacerbated by the fact that the skates looked to be about her size. She lugged off her boots, and was in the process of lacing up the skates, a half size too big– a problem easily solved by thicker socks– when Bobby walked in, wondering where she’d wandered off to.

Bobby’s shocked look had Deanna fumbling for an excuse.

“Keep ‘em,” Bobby said gruffly.

“I–what?” Deanna said, her apology tangling itself on her tongue in her confusion.

“I said keep ‘em, don’t make me repeat myself.”

“Thanks Bobby, I didn’t mean to–“ Bobby waved off her excuse.

“Karen would have wanted you to have ‘em. Come on now, you just gonna sit there or are you gonna try ‘em out?”

Bobby continued to watch as Deanna finished lacing the skates up and made an attempt to stand, which was amusing considering Deanna had never worn roller skates in her life and standing is a lot harder when you have eight wheels strapped to your feet. But of course she wasn’t going to tell that to Bobby, and she managed to stand long enough to say “Ta-da!” before a slight move of her foot had her waving her arms around in an attempt to keep her balance.

Bobby laughed and helped Deanna back into a sitting position on the floor, “Now where’s that damned tool I asked you to find for me?”

Deanna spent the rest of that summer trying out the skates whenever she wasn’t helping Bobby in the garage. She suffered through scraped knees and a bruised ass, determined to figure the whole thing out. Bobby was conspicuously silent in regard to her scrapes and bruises, seemingly content to let her continue with her struggle, until one day he pulled a fast one on Deanna and dropped the deed to “Singer Skates” in her lap.

“What’s this?” Deanna asked, as she flipped through the document and landed on the last page with the picture of an old building in the less populated part of town surrounded by other seldom used buildings and empty lots.

Bobby had managed to buy the old skate rink in town, which had been closed for almost twenty years and resembled something out of a post-apocalyptic movie than anything. Apparently Karen had been a derby girl back in her heyday and her dream had been to revamp the old place and open it up for young girls to have a place to practice a sport that excluded boys for a change. She’d never gotten around to it, the damned cancer taking her before they managed to get the funds saved up, and the savings account for it had gone untouched since her passing, accumulating quite a bit of interest in the intervening years.

“It’s yours if you fix up the place, all I ask is you keep the name.”

Deanna would not soon forget how red Bobby had gotten when she’d kissed his cheek and hugged him tight.

So instead of busting her ass trying to learn how to skate, Deanna spent all her free time she wasn’t working for Bobby at his garage fixing up the abandoned skating rink. She managed to bring in Charlie, a friend Deanna had made during her LARPing phase, not that that sort of thing ever really went away, and it was Charlie who actually introduced Deanna into the new generation of banked-track roller derby. Charlie had heard of the sport’s grassroots re-emergence and had been immediately captivated by the sheer amount of effort and athleticism put into the sport, all of it done by women who did this in addition to their day jobs. A few days spent on YouTube and Wikipedia was enough to have the metaphorical wheels in Deanna’s imagination spinning. Fueled by Charlie’s genuine interest in forming Sioux Falls very first roller derby team, Deanna began planning the beginnings of the thing that would change their lives forever.

Of course, they had to actually have a rink to skate in first. And as much as Bobby had helped by buying out the place, his savings didn’t actually cover all of the costs of renovating the skating rink or in adding a banked track that would be suitable for league competitions. There was also the part where the current labor force was Deanna, Charlie who stood around with blueprints telling Deanna what to do, and Bobby, who would pop in occasionally seemingly out of boredom than let on that he was hoping Deanna would actually get the rink up and running.

The addition of Pamela Barnes was definitely a highlight of the early, pre-functional Singer Skates days. She was the one that actually approached Deanna about joining the team. Deanna knew Pam was an old friend of Bobby’s, but she hadn’t known that Pam had actually done a bit of derby herself. When Bobby had casually mentioned that Deanna was fixing up the old skating rink and was in the midst of starting up a derby team, well Pamela had pretty much packed her bags and set out for Sioux Falls.

Her inclusion in the team went something like this:

“So I heard you’re thinking of starting up a derby team.”

“Yeah, it’s kind of up in the air at the moment. We need to make sure that we even have a rink to practice in before we seriously start considering a team.”

“Well if you need an extra pair of hands, and maybe someone who’s familiar with the derby scene…”

“Seriously?”

“Let’s just say I’m game to relive those days.”

“Done! You’re in.”

Lisa Braeden had been the fourth addition to their team. She had never done derby, but a not-so-brief stint working at the roller skate drive thru diner in town made her comfortable on a set of wheels. After all, balancing food trays wasn’t so different from ramming into opponents, right? Deanna had very little persuading to do when she asked Lisa to join the team. They had a bit of history, what with Deanna crushing on Lisa during high school and the whole ordeal culminating in one crazy weekend along with what’s-his-name, yeah, they knew how to work together.

Through the addition of the girls and carefully strategized fund raising events, they were able to bring in enough money to bring the place back into shape. A large part of the town was actually enthused about having the old skating rink functioning again, and it helped that Bobby knew local sheriff Jody Mills who ensured that the once abandoned part of town would be safe for public enjoyment.

With four members out of their needed five, and Singer Skates just about ready to apply for the needed licenses and insurance to be open to the public, Deanna began to see that the start of their roller derby team was quickly becoming a reality faster than she’d anticipated. She’d been so busy in trying to fix up the roller rink to meet their projected opening day, for which the girls had been instrumental in starting up the buzz around town, that she hadn’t even considered that the summer opening date would more or less coincide with Sammy’s summer vacation from Stanford.

“So Sammy, how’s Jesse?” Deanna asked casually, as she drove her sister home from the airport.

“He’s good, we’re good, real good,” Samantha replied, barely containing the dreamy look that came over her face any time she talked to Deanna about Jesse, the boy she’d been dating since the start of her freshman year.

“He gonna come visit you this summer?”

“He can’t, he got an internship over at the med center, it’s working out well for him.”

“Look at you Sammy, snagging the good ones already, you best marry that boy.”

“Shut up.”

“So you don’t plan on marrying him and legally becoming Jesse’s Girl?”

“That joke got old the first month, it wasn’t funny then and it isn’t funny now,” Sammy said, rolling her eyes.

“Oh come on, you know you love it, plus it’d make a good derby name.”

“Derby name? Is this some kind of cult you’ve joined since I’ve been gone? Have you finally made friends that aren’t Charlie? Just don’t drink the Kool Aid.”

“Ha ha, very funny. I’m serious though, want to join the team?”

“You’ve seriously started a derby team?” Sammy asked, eyebrows raised dubiously.

“Did you really not listen to the past months of conversations we’ve been having?”

“You mentioned you were fixing up the old roller skating rink, and you might have mentioned starting a roller derby team, but I thought you were joking. You live under a rock half the time, I wasn’t sure if you knew that was a thing.”

“I’m wounded, Sammy, and just because I still use tapes does not mean I live under a rock.”

“You didn’t even know what WiFi was.”

“Oh shut up, so are you in or are you in?”

After some prodding and Deanna making promises that she had no intention of keeping, Sammy agreed to join the team. If only because she didn’t have anything planned for the summer. Not to mention she had a bit of a competitive streak in her that was begging to come out in the form of competitive sports. After all, you don’t get into Stanford on a full ride if you aren’t highly competitive.

 

With the five members needed to start up a new team, Charlie set to starting up the paperwork that would make Team Free Wheel (“I still can’t believe we let you choose the team name Dee.” “Shut it Jesse’s Girl, that’s why you kept the derby name I came up with.”) an official team. Not that they were anything more than a team in name, considering that two of the five team members had never skated in their lives, let alone on a banked track.

The first few practices of the newly created Team Free Wheel were more of a disaster than anything else. Lisa literally skated circles around them pretending to take their orders. Pamela, for all her talk about the glory days, hadn’t used skates in years, and spent half the time figuring out how to stop once she got started. Charlie more or less spent her time clinging to the rails, legs stiff when they weren’t shaking. Deanna (a moderate skater from having spent a few of her nights practicing alone in the rink before it opened) decided that her time was better employed pushing Sammy whenever her younger sister seemed to get the hang of balancing on wheeled feet.

It took several weeks of training, but eventually they were all able to go and stop with practiced ease. But this was all on the flat skating rink that took up half the warehouse. They hadn’t even made it onto the banked track that was crucial to roller derby.

But Pamela deemed them ready to start the actual training for competitive derby, so they took to the track.

It became apparent very quickly that they’d need to invest in some serious protective gear if they planned on coming out of their training sessions with as few broken limbs as possible. At least that way they’d escape with just bruises on their bodies and egos, and not have to have an EMT on hand anytime they wanted to practice.

They spent the better part of an afternoon learning the rules of the game, new terminology slowly creeping its way into their everyday speech. They went to watch their first live derby scrimmage once they understood the basic rules of the game and would at least be able to follow the game with some vague idea of what was going on. Sammy figured that actually being at a rink rather than crowding around a small computer screen would better serve them to actually get a feel for the game.

So one weekend they piled into the Impala and drove to nearby city that actually had a derby league of its own and was halfway through the skating season. Deanna had never had so much fun watching a competitive sport. Maybe it was the general vibe, but she immediately felt at ease surrounded by hundreds of people who considered strapping wheels to your feet and skating in circles trying to block each other the pinnacle of competitive team sports. She could tell that despite her initial reluctance, Sammy was wide-eyed and appreciative. And though the crowd had changed since her years, Pamela could still feel the very essence of what gave roller derby its appeal.

Deanna watched all the details of the game with rapturous attention. From the skates of each skater, to some of their painted faces, to the way they made their way on and off the banked track. Even without having ever heard of or watched either team before, Deanna found herself cheering for them both, exclaiming loudly when one jammer passed the other, or cursing when a particularly good blocker managed to push another off the track. What amazed her even more was how quickly every girl was to recover when she took a particularly nasty fall, falls that would resound and made Deanna grit her teeth. But those girls just shook off the fall and continued skating, the pain of the blow was nothing when your head was in the game.

When the winning team members were once again announced and greeted with thunderous cheers and applause, Deanna knew that that was where she wanted to be.

 

Their first practice after watching the match had them trying to determine who would play what position. The jammer, the skater who would actually score the points in the game, was the natural position of contention. They agreed that the fastest of the team would get the spot, as speed would be best when trying to lap the opposing team. Deanna decided that that was the position she wanted. Her natural stubbornness and ability to engage wholeheartedly in something she deemed worthwhile, meant that she spent most of her time at the rink than not. It got to the point where Bobby threatened to pull the sponsorship of Singer Skates for the team if Deanna didn’t at least try to make an attempt to get decent sleep back at his house.

But in the end it paid off, when Deanna scored the fastest time out of them all.

 

That had been nearly four years ago.

 

“Faster, princess, that lap won’t skate itself!”

Deanna bites back a retort and instead forces herself to skate faster, the burn in her calves and thighs increasing with every push, sweat threatening to drip into her eyes. She practically flies across the start up line, the shrill sound of a whistle accompanying Pamela’s shout of,

“Time!”

Deanna slows, attempting to catch her breath, and lets the momentum of her last lap take her around the track once more. She wipes the sweat off her brow before gliding up to the rest of her team who have assembled in the middle of the banked track.

“So?” she asks, taking a swig of water from her nearly empty water bottle before taking a seat beside Sam.

“Better, but it won’t be that easy when–” Pamela begins, her hand still on the timer.

“Yes, I know, I know. But you guys are great blockers, I think I can handle the other team’s jammer,” Deanna unbuckles her helmet, the inside damp with perspiration.

“Don’t be so cocky,” Lisa pipes up from beside Charlie, who is busy taking off her skates.

“Oh come on, we’ve worked harder this season than before. We’re in the best shape we’ve been in since…forever,” Deanna says, trying to give some order to her helmet hair, her closely cropped hair styled with her sweat. “We just need to keep whatever winning streak we have going on.”

“We might have defeated the Hellbladers in the last couple bouts, but they’re not the only ones we’ll be facing at playoffs, or championships, if we make it that far,” Sammy says, and Deanna mentally curses her sister for bringing up rational points when Deanna is trying to be anything but.

“Relax, we got this,” Deanna says, and since when did she become the pinnacle of optimism for their ragtag team?

Pamela raises an eyebrow, before sighing and shaking her head.

“What?” Deanna asks, she hates when they leave her out of the loop. She’d started the damn team for crying out loud, she should be the first one in on the gossip, derby related or not.

“Team Heavenly Hostess is making an appearance at playoffs this year.”

“Who?” Deanna says, thinking absurdly about how good a Twinkie would be right about now.

“Heavenly Hostess. They’re that new team out of Illinois I’ve been trying to tell you about, they’ve been rising in ranks since they started,” Charlie says matter of fact. Knowing her, she’s probably been following each team’s stats for the season, and knows who’s who on the roster for playoffs. Charlie could probably even get a pretty good line up drawn up for which teams will actually make it to championships, and maybe even calculate the probability each team has for winning.

“According to the forums, they’re expected to skate circles around everyone at playoffs,” Sammy adds, and Charlie nods conspiratorially. Great, now they’re both obsessing over stats and derby gossip. Deanna tells them as much and gets a laugh from Lisa.

“Alright, alright, enough. You girls need to hit the showers, you all reek,” Pamela says, shooing them off the benches. They all march off, teasing Pamela with a “Yes, mom,” which she accepts with good grace.

 

That night Charlie pulls up a video of a scrimmage between the Heavenly Hostess and the Wonder Womyn, a team that had held the lead in the Illinois league of the North Central Division, and had consistently ranked in the Division 1 bracket. The Wonder Womyn all have about a foot on the members of Heavenly Hostess, their blockers look freakin’ intimidating, and Deanna knows from experience that long legs on a track equate to speed. Their own team had been spared from competing against them during playoffs last year, then they’d been taken out at championships before they faced them there as well.

Deanna watches intently as the teams arrange themselves on the track, and with a whistle they’re off. Heavenly Hostess is dressed in white to Wonder Womyn’s red and yellow combination, but even so, the blockers form a dense pack that make it difficult to distinguish where one team ends and the other begins, and it’s nearly impossible for the jammers to make their way through them to actually begin scoring.

“That’s Thursday’s Angel, their jammer,” Charlie says, pointing out a dark-haired girl with a star on her helmet, “And Angelic Awakening is their main pivot,” she points to a redheaded girl with a stripe on her helmet. The bout starts about evenly matched, but it soon becomes apparent that team Heavenly Hostess is all Charlie and Sammy have been making them out to be. Thursday’s Angel, weird derby name, Deanna thinks, becomes almost a blur on the screen as she passes the pack, her teammates opening a path for her to get through. The camera pans out in order to keep the pack of blockers and the jammer in shot. Thursday’s Angel skates circles around the opposing team, both figuratively and in the literal sense that the whole point of the game is to lap the other team. Heavenly Hostess’ strategy of calling the bout after they’ve scored ensures that the Wonder Womyn get almost no points in, and the score by the end of the quarter is a ridiculous fifty-four to seven. The Wonder Womyn grow desperate in the last bout and earn themselves a few penalties, causing a slight pileup and the Hostess win the match with Thursday’s Angel jumping over the fallen skaters, earning their team an additional four points.

The finishing score is impressive, for any team, but the fact that they’re so new to the derby scene makes it doubly so.

Deanna goes to bed wondering how their team will hold up against such fierce competition come playoffs.

 

Apparently Deanna isn’t the only one left thinking about the Heavenly Hostess. The upstart team is the topic of conversation for the next few weeks.

“Do you know how many bouts they must have competed in to even make the rankings their first year?” Charlie says, all awe.

The answer to that question is a lot. Math isn’t Deanna’s forte, but she’s had Charlie give her the basics on understanding how the Women’s Banked Track Derby Association, or WBTDA for short, determines their rankings, and yeah, Heavenly Hostess is pretty much unparalleled in the number of short scrimmages and four-quarter bouts they’ve participated in.

“I mean, even _we_ didn’t break into rankings our first year, and we’re considered one of the best teams around. It’s unprecedented,” Charlie continues, perusing the stats page on the WBTDA website.

And because Deanna knows that rankings are posted for a reason, she spends a few days going over the changes in the ranking for the past year. By the time Deanna’s caught up with the current rankings, there’s no doubt in her mind that Heavenly Hostess deserves a chance to compete in Division 1 playoffs.

Deanna won’t admit to it, but after watching the video Charlie showed her, she’s more than intrigued with the team, she looks up even more videos of the Heavenly Hostess. It’s the same for almost every decent video she finds. Their jammer, Thursday’s Angel is a blur, moving around the track with a natural grace that would be better suited to ballet, even figure skating.

She doesn’t remember being so enraptured by watching a person skate since the first time she watched a roller derby competition, and she’s seen plenty of teams and hundreds of skaters in that time. Deanna is breathless when she loads the next video, the person who recorded it was obviously a fan, the camera zooming in on Thursday’s Angel’s face, blue eyes framed by dark lashes, a face of fierce determination. Deanna is struck suddenly by how absolutely gorgeous the skater is. Now, Deanna knows that she is considered a beauty by most, okay, almost all standards, but there’s something about those striking blue eyes and the fact that the whole package comes wrapped up in a derby girl costume that really gets her wheels spinning.

It’s unfair how Deanna entered the situation wanting to hate every member of Heavenly Hostess, but instead she’s sporting a crush the roughly the size of the Pacific Ocean, and on their jammer no less, a jammer, who Deanna would very much like to face come playoffs, or championships. Not that anyone is going to find out about her crush, it’s the type of secret that gets taken to the grave at the risk of humiliation. It’s one thing to openly hate your rival, it’s another thing entirely to develop schoolgirl crushes. The novelty should wear off soon, Deanna is a sucker for a pretty face, and it doesn’t help that she hasn’t been laid in months. The annual derby event promises the cure her of both her ailments, and Deanna is almost certain that her silly fixation with the blue-eyed Angel will have blown over by then.

 

The annual derby event thrown by Singer Skates and hosted by Team Free Wheel is always scheduled three weeks before playoffs. While Team Free Wheel wasn’t known in the skating league for their extreme skill or their thunder thighs, they did have a knack for throwing crazy tournaments out of season and for throwing even crazier after-parties. Of course once they broke out into the derby scene, the scale and expectations for every year were raised slightly higher.

Between practicing for playoffs and the tournament and getting Singer Skates ready to host said tournament, Deanna is strung up tight. A few restless nights has her on Sammy’s borrowed laptop, and she finds herself being drawn to watching every available video on Thursday’s Angel. Her crush, if anything, has only grown.

Of course, a week before the schedules tournament’s starting date, WBTDA decide that Thursday’s Angel deserves Featured Skater of the Month. Deanna almost pulls her hair out in frustration when Charlie and Sammy tell her and link the damned article on the website.

Turns out team Heavenly Hostess feature pretty heavily on the WBTDA website, what with their respective league being league of the month, and their jammer, Thursday’s Angel, being the current Featured Skater. Deanna is immediately engrossed in reading up about the jammer.

The article features a picture of the skater mid-skate, the star on her helmet visible, and eyes so shockingly blue, that despite the less than stellar quality of the picture, Deanna can make them out clearly. It’s easier to see the details of her derby outfit this close as well, the practically trademark wings on her skates, and the white tank top and white leggings, contrasted with the black of her protective gear. Thursday’s Angel’s hair is prudently tied back into a braid. Deanna reads the brief blurb the website gives about the skater before digging into the actual answers provided by Thursday’s Angel.

_What is your derby name? Thursday’s Angel._

_Please explain the inspiration and story behind your derby name. It’s from my real name, Castielle, though the real Angel of Thursday is Castiel. My family is pretty religious, and it reflects on our team name as well, the Heavenly Hostess. There’s not much else to it, pretty straightforward._

_What is your number? 3. It’s my lucky number._

_What team(s) do you play on? The Heavenly Hostess_

_Do you have a pre-bout ritual? Yes I do. Although its more of an extension of my daily routine. I’m a runner at heart, which is why I enjoy skating so much, it’s like running but much faster, it lets me feel the wind in my hair. I always make sure to get in a few extra miles during the week before a major bout, to maintain my endurance on and off the track. I also believe in a good diet, it can go a long way, but I won’t say no to a great burger post-bout._

_What do you think about when you’re lacing up your skates? As I mentioned before, my family is highly religious, so I am careful to never omit a silent prayer. Just to make sure I’m safe, and that I have the strength to do what I go on the track to do, to play a good game and hopefully win._

_Do you have a theme song? No. I’ve never listened to much music outside of the classical genre, and it’s difficult to choose a piece of music from such a large collection._

_What is your pre-derby sports/skating background? Again, I’m a runner, so I ran track and did a bit of cross-country while in school. I actually hold a few records back in my high school and my university. But track is a pretty individual sport, so it was nice to work with a team for a change._

_What is your position of choice? Jammer. Though I’d be interested in being a blocker._

_How would you describe your derby playing style? It’s adaptive. I work well under pressure and can make changes to how I approach every bout and every team. As a team we’ve spent countless hours learning to play off each other’s needs. I owe a lot to my team. Other than that, speed. Speed goes a long way for a jammer._

_What are some of your greatest roller derby accomplishments on the track? I’m a pretty harsh judge of myself, so I had to defer this question to my teammate Anna, also known as Angelic Awakening, who says that the bout that qualified us for Division 1 was one of my best bouts. So, helping the team qualify._

_How do you find a balance between your derby life and your “real” life? It’s very easy for me to forget about the “real” world when I have wheels strapped to my feet, and it’s very easy for me to forget about derby when I’m neck deep in studying. I find it very therapeutic to have escapes from both parts of my life, it helps compartmentalize and dictates my priorities. I’m in the process of getting my EMT certification, so that comes first, but I won’t turn down a chance to compete just because I had a rough night of EMT training._

_Do you have any upcoming bouts that you’re really excited for? We’ll be traveling next month for a few friendly bouts that a South Dakota Team will be putting on. That will be the first time we’re playing a lot of those teams, so it’ll be nice to get to compete with them before playoffs._

_Your team’s costumes are very interesting; does your outfit ever make it difficult to skate? The wing flaps on our skates are actually unobtrusive, even if they don’t look that way. Initially, Gaby, or The Archangel, as you know her, wanted us to wear wings on our backs. But they wouldn’t have been very aerodynamic and I don’t actually know if they would have been approved for competitions, so Gaby had to settle for these. They’re a bit much in my opinion, but now I really wouldn’t change a thing._

_Your team is new to WBTDA, how did your rise in rank come about so quickly? We trained hard and pushed ourselves to the limit. We were eager to compete, and I think that reflects in our scores and ranking. Discipline and individual growth, as well as team growth, has definitely played an integral part in our success. It’s important, also, that we all had the same goal in mind, we wanted to win, and so we’re doing our best to make that dream a reality._

Despite all the information, not a lot is actually known about the skaters outside of the information they’ve provided and the countless videos of them skating at various competitions around Illinois, and Deanna feels as if she’s only gotten a glimpse of who this skater really is.

 

Before they know it, the Singer Skates Pre-Playoff Skate Off is upon them and Deanna is making the opening speech that marks the beginning of the tournament.

“Hi everyone, I just want to welcome you all again to Sioux Falls. I know for some of you it’s your first time here,” there were a few cheers from the crowd, “and congratulations to you, for others of you welcome back,” even more cheers, “I just want to say how thankful I am that you all came, this really couldn’t have been done without your continued support. To think that just a few years ago Team Free Wheel was barely a blip on the derby radar, but this community is all about helping the little guy find traction, and we owe the continued success of Singer Skates to your crazy enthusiasm. It’s why we’re able to do what we love, and as always this is our way of expressing some of that gratitude. We’re going to try to make this year even better than the last, so strap on your skates and I’ll meet you on the track!”

The rink explodes into cheers, and Deanna steps down from the bench that was her podium into a crowd of derby girls slapping her on the back and hugging her. She can’t help but be swept up into the chaos that is the annual Singer Skates sponsored pre-playoffs derby event.

The match-ups for the tournament are randomly chosen the day of the competition. It ensures that opposing teams will be able to face teams that they wouldn’t normally be able to play against during playoffs and championships. It also means that while some division 2 teams will be playing division 1 teams and likely out of the tournament quicker, there are some division 1 teams that will be poised against each other and are going to have bigger spectator turn ups. As it is, half the teams that show up at the tournament come purely to scope out other teams and check out their strategies, choosing to watch the bouts rather than participate in them.

That means that while half of the teams present are actually participating in the friendly tournament, there are quite a few that are eager to just hang out and reunite with teams from other leagues that only ever get to mingle during inter-league competitions such as this. And as much as Deanna keeps an eye out for the arrival of team Heavenly Hostess, it gets increasingly difficult as the morning becomes afternoon. It doesn’t help that she’s not only a popular jammer from a popular team, but also as part-time show runner of the tournament. Occasionally she gets stopped by a few teams that want to say “Hello,” or Charlie will stop her and point out the arrival of a rival team. Half the time she doesn’t even know where the rest of her teammates are, they’re all so wrapped up in trying to get the event to go smoothly.

It’s by pure luck, or fate, that Deanna is by the entrance when team Heavenly Hostess finally makes their appearance. And okay, maybe Deanna had been entertaining ideas of their appearance to be something akin to Bingley and Co. arriving at the Meryton Assembly, but her life isn’t half as exciting as Elizabeth Bennet’s, and Sioux Falls is no Meryton. So the rink doesn’t go completely silent, but there’s an increase in the buzz of background conversations as Heavenly Hostess make their way to the makeshift check-in booth that was skate rentals. Deanna watches like a hawk as the group stands around awkwardly while a person who appears to be their coach handles the basic paperwork.

Deanna easily picks out Thursday’s Angel amongst the team, she’s standing between the redheaded pivot, Angelic Awakening, and a shorter but stockier brunette who Deanna thinks is The Archangel, Gaby. Their whole entrance has the effect of removing whatever rose-tinted glass Deanna had been seeing them through. She can’t help but notice the nice emblem of their team’s name on their duffel bags, the whole thing screams “sponsorship” and “snob.” Being sponsored in the first year of the team’s inception is near unheard of, especially to the degree that Heavenly Hostess seems to be sponsored. Few derby teams can brag about being sponsored, and even then it’s something like along the lines of Team Free Wheel being sponsored by Singer Skates because half the owners play on the team. And Singer Skates might sponsor Team Free Will, but few of their derby purchases actually come from Singer Skates funds. Even their accommodations and other travel expenses to neighboring cities for bouts or other big events like playoffs and championships always come out of their own pockets.

Deanna hardly notices when Charlie and Lisa join her in watching the new arrivals take an empty bench, she’s so caught up in trying to reconcile this picture of Heavenly Hostess with the one she had made up in her head.

“So what have you been able to find out about our lovely pastries?” Deanna asks Charlie, because Charlie has a knack for finding out secrets about people’s past lives and even though Deanna has never asked directly, she knows it’s not by entirely legal means.

“Naomi is their coach.”

“Which one is Naomi?”

Charlie points out a matronly looking woman who’s sitting side rink, a stern look on her face as if she disapproves of what she’s seeing. The only thing about her that could possibly hint at the fact that she’s indeed in the right place and not lost, is the red lanyard around her neck, and the silver whistle attached to it. All Deanna needs to complete the image is a clipboard, which, lo and behold, is on the bench right next to her, a safeguard to discourage people from sitting any closer.

“She’s just their coach, doesn’t actually skate, and if rumors are to be believed, has never actually been seen in anything but that awful pant-suit. But she’s a damned good coach if their rankings and mere presence here are anything to go by.”

“First up on the team is Gaby, otherwise known as The Archangel. Her dad apparently sponsors the team, although I had a really hard time trying to figure out who her dad actually is, but there were so many things blocking me that the only thing I was able to verify was that 1) her dad is a real person, and 2) no, the company has no association with the actual Hostess bakery.”

Deanna tries not to actually be disappointed to find that the team isn’t actually sponsored by the pastry company, and more with the fact that so they might not have the sponsorship she thought they had, but that the sponsorship is still pretty big.

“Next we have Anna, aka Angelic Awakening, their main pivot. Natural redhead. She’s good at what she does, I’ve studied her blocking technique with Sam, and she is half the reason that Thursday’s Angel gets past the pack most of the time.

“Then there’s Thursday’s Angel, if anything she’s the one we know the most about, and I was able to find something about her being related to The Archangel and Angelic Awakening, it’s all very within the family.

“Then there are twins Hester and Rachel, better known as Seraph and Cherub. They’ve all got these weird angel related names, goes with the theme.

“Did I mention that none of them had any previous experience on the track? All of them started training at the same time under Naomi. And no one actually knows what they’re like outside of the rink, because apparently they leave almost immediately after every match. But people still like them, despite the fact that half the people who have faced them have all felt intensely intimidated by them.”

Deanna thanks Charlie for the information. There’s a lot to process, and not a lot of time to do it, because the first bouts start that night.

 

There’s a lot of excited murmuring around the track for Heavenly Hostess’ first match. Most of the people have only heard about the team, their skill is some sort of urban legend that’s been passed around. And as with every rumor, no one is exactly sure what parts of what rumors are based in fact. Deanna even hears a wild theory that some members of team Heavenly Hostess have specially engineered skates with tiny motors that let them skate faster. Deanna is pretty sure that that particular rumor is fake, but after watching several videos of their speed she can see how whoever started the rumor would think that way.

Deanna makes sure to be at the side of the rink when Heavenly Hostess goes up for their first bout. She listens with amusement as Ash does his usual commentary on the match, along with Jo who is actually the more reliable of the two for actually commenting on what’s happening on the track. Ash continues his hilarious tendency to belt out random sponsorship tags (“We’d like to thank Hostess for sending us these delicious Sno Balls, drop by the commentator table later so I can describe in detail how many I’ve eaten.”) despite the fact that the only sponsor is Singer Skates and a few other mom-and-pop shops and restaurants in town.

The other team is announced first, and they have a look on their faces like they can’t believe they drew the short straw of having to face Heavenly Hostess first, but at the same time they can’t believe that they’re lucky to be facing Heavenly Hostess. Luckily they’re both Division 1 teams, so it’s fairly matched.

“And up next we have Heavenly Hostess, their line up include Thursday’s Angel, Angelic Awakening, The Archangel, Seraph and Cherub,” Jo says as the team hits the rink.

“I wouldn’t be able to tell which is which if they weren’t wearing their numbers,” Ash comments.

The bout goes just about how Deanna expected. Heavenly Hostess take the lead with ease, Thursday’s Angel getting past the pack and skating back around, going so far as to not call the bout as soon as she’s gone around once, the rest of her team is doing such a good job of blocking. They play with no mercy, as if this were an actual playoff and not just a friendly derby meet to get people ready for what to expect at playoffs.

They win with such an ease that makes competitive derby look easy, and Deanna can’t help the jealousy that hits her with full force. She knows first hand that derby is anything but easy, the numerous bumps and bruises she’s had are proof of that.

 

Deanna is in the last stall of restroom when she hears the door open the sound of two pairs of footsteps and voices that became distinctly louder alert her to the fact that the duo probably thinks there isn’t anyone else in the restroom, and a conversation resumes.

Deanna knows she shouldn’t listen, but it is kind of hard to do that when you are stuck in a stall and don’t want to come out and pretend you hadn’t been listening in on a conversation when you obviously had been. Bathrooms are just like that, voices, just like the sound of pee, tend to carry quite well over and between stalls. Plus, those voices are familiar in their unfamiliarity, and the longer they talk the more Deanna is convinced that this is a conversation she really doesn’t want to miss out on. She opens the bathroom stall door just enough to get a peek at the two girls.

“They look like they’re having so much fun out there,” the redhead says, she’s still in her derby outfit. It’s Angelic Awakening with none other than Thursday’s Angel.

“I don’t see what’s so fun about losing,” Thursday’s Angel replies, watching the other skater reapply her makeup.

“Maybe that’s the point though.”

“What do you mean?”

“I’m just saying that I don’t think I’ve ever had fun since we’ve started this. Okay, it was somewhat fun at the beginning, but it got old, fast.”

“We’ve won since we started, that has to count for something.”

“I just don’t know if that’s enough anymore.”

“What are you saying? Do you want to quit?”

“That’s not what I’m saying. But what I’ve seen out there today, I want that. I want to be able to get on that track and not have to think about whether or not Naomi is going to scream her head off at me after because my form was off or if I could have blocked better.”

Thursday’s Angel remains silent, and Deanna watches the two girls exit the bathroom. Only then does she allow herself to breathe again. So there is trouble in paradise it seems. She knows the stress of the competition could get to some teams, especially during competitive bouts at this level. Even so, it looked like the problems of the Heavenly Hostess stemmed from a fundamental difference in why they joined derby in the first place.

Deanna knows the red headed girl has the right idea going on. Roller derby can’t possibly be fun if you are more worried about winning than if you couldn’t care less what the outcome was so long as everyone had a good time. And maybe Deanna has the wrong idea about team sports, but having fun has always been on the top of her list. Sure, winning is a bonus and a damned good incentive, but Deanna doesn’t think she would be doing derby this long if she didn’t find it fun, even when they lost.

Deanna waits a while longer before exiting the restroom so that she won’t be caught coming out the restroom by its previous occupants. She might not know them, but she thinks it’s the kind of conversation that is usually kept from the rest of the team.

 

Deanna doesn’t have any more time to watch where Heavenly Hostess goes off to, but if she had, she would have noticed that a certain jammer had watched her as intently as Deanna had watched her.

It is Team Free Wheel’s luck that their first bout would be against team Hellbladers. There is some history between the teams, enough that Charlie likes to refer to them as their evil nemesis. All Deanna knows is she’d rather not have to deal with Ruby, who had a thing against Sam that had resulted in more than one broken limb on both sides, despite all of Sam’s insistence that it was collateral damage of the game.

They’re introduced onto the track with enthusiastic cheers and Ash makes sure to comment on Deanna’s latest addition to her outfit.

“If I am not mistaken Jo, does Deanna have the words ‘Kiss My KAZ’ printed on her ass?”

“That would be correct. Classy as always, Deanna,” Jo says, and Deanna salutes them with a wink as she skates by the commentator’s table.

“In case ya’ll didn’t notice that giant black car outside, well that’s our resident jammer’s ride which she seems to love more than derby itself. Or at least she loves it enough to get part of her license plate on her buttocks and her whole derby name and number inspired by it,” Jo supplies helpfully.

“There’s a penis joke in there somewhere,” Ash deadpans, and Deanna rolls her eyes good heartedly before blocking out any further comments until the start of the game.

The Hellbladers are tough competition any time during the season, but with playoffs looming so close, they play extra hard and extra dirty. The starting whistle barely goes off before someone’s already on the floor, and while penalties are all part of a game, any scrimmages between the two teams always seem to end up with someone being ejected from the track for unsportsmanlike conduct.

Being a friendly derby meet– Deanna doesn’t know why they keep using the word “friendly” to describe the event since on the track it’s anything _but_ friendly– the bouts are limited to two fifteen-minute halves instead of the usual fifteen-minute quarters. It helps speed along the bouts over the course of the two-day tournament. It also means that there’s a lot of pressure to score in the first half and get the point margin as wide as possible with the hopes of just having to focus on blocking rather than on scoring in the second half.

They’re about eight minutes into the first half, Team Free Wheel is up by thirteen points, a point margin that can be easily closed with a penalty on a jammer or a blocker. Deanna struggles to get through the block of skaters in order to lap them, but Sammy is great about opening passages for her, and she manages to get through. By this time it’s the same routine of skating as fast as she can and trying to get past the mass of the combined teams. She’s so caught up in trying to lap the teams that she forgets to keep an eye on her opposing jammer, and before Deanna knows what hits her, she’s lying on the ground, the wind knocked out of her and pain shooting up her left shoulder.

It hurts. A lot.

But in the game you better get up fast before risking getting a penalty on yourself for obstructing the play, and Deanna tries to put weight on her arm in an attempt to get up. It’s agony, and she chooses to lie down again. She’s so focused on the pain she barely hears the noises around her, the whistles stopping the game lost and replaced with a steady ringing in her ears and black spots dotting her vision. When she finally manages to gasp for air it’s as if the un-mute button has been pressed and the rush of noise hits her at once. She wants to cry out in pain, but she bites it back.

Blue eyes come into view, hovering above her. Blue-Eyes is speaking, but Deanna can’t hear a word, and the air is only just returning to her lungs.

“What-?” Deanna manages to mumble, but it comes out a lot more slurred.

“Are you okay? Don’t try to get up, I think you dislocated your shoulder.”

The voice of Blue-Eyes sounds frantic, worried even, but all Deanna can focus on is the possibility of a dislocated shoulder. While injuries aren’t uncommon, a good fall or fracture can put even the toughest skater out of commission for a few days. If they’re lucky they won’t miss a bout. Deanna knew what she signed up for though, and if Team Free Wheel is out of the running for play-offs, well that’s all on her.

“Deanna! Deanna, don’t move, the paramedics are here,” Sammy’s shrill voice breaks Deanna out of her stupor, and she finds her voice.

“I’m fine, honestly, just, a bruise,” she says, attempting to get up again, “No! Nope, never mind, I’m not fine. _Jesus Christ_ that _hurts_.”

There’s more scrambling as people get out of the way for the on-hand EMTs to get to Deanna, and she loses sight of Blue-Eyes.

The paramedics confirm a dislocated shoulder and give Deanna a couple of Vicodin for the next few days, and with a sling for her bruised arm, they notify her that she’ll survive but skating is completely out of the question for a couple of days, though a couple weeks off would be better. The news isn’t terrible, and while it helps to be injury-free during bouts, shoulders aren’t the most essential part of skating. Deanna’s still got two fully functional legs and very damn well intends to be ready for playoffs.

The bout goes to the Hellbladers who advances into the semi-finals for the next day. The team member that caused Deanna’s injury is ejected however, which means that it will be difficult for them to get past the next round of disqualifications short one player.

That night the first of the famed Singer Skates party goes into effect, with teams advancing into the semi-finals not abstaining from the activities. Its not tradition if one person doesn’t throw up on the track, or entire teams dropping out due to massive hang-over’s.

Deanna, slightly hazy from the painkillers, gets put in the proverbial corner, with Sammy watching over her so that she doesn’t drink. Deanna doesn’t like the idea of having to miss out on the best part of partying, but considers that her painkiller buzz is pretty decent, even when she isn’t allowed to challenge people to pool on account of her injured shoulder.

Its during the time that Sammy takes a restroom break from her guarding duties, that Deanna goes in search of some alcohol to wash down the pain medication she needs to take, the previous dose is already wearing off and she can feel the beginnings of an ache. She has a red cup halfway full of the jungle juice Pam made– and Pam makes the best mixed-alcohol drinks Deanna has ever tasted– when she’s stopped by Miss Blue-Eyed-Angel.

“You shouldn’t be drinking while you’re on pain medication.”

Deanna drops the punch ladle into the bowl with a splash, “Oh shit! Don’t sneak up on me like that! Christ, you’ll give me a heart attack.”

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to.”

Deanna turns to face the skater, almost bumping her achy shoulder into the other girl with how close she’s standing next to her, “Ever heard of a thing called personal space?”

The girl blinks.

Deanna sighs, “A little space would be nice?”

“Sorry,” the other girl honest to goodness blushes, as if she’s been caught doing something bad, before she takes a step back. And for some strange reason Deanna thinks it’s the cutest fucking thing in the world, and that’s definitely the drugs talking because there are very few things in the world that qualify as “cute” in Deanna’s book.

“Did you come over here just to tell me off? Or…?” Deanna trails off, she isn’t sure what to say now that’s she’s actually face to face with the person she’s been crushing on for the better part of the past few months.

“I–yes...No! That’s not why I’m here. Sorry about your shoulder.”

“You don’t have to be sorry, it’s all part of the game, right?”

By this time they’ve wandered back to Deanna’s corner, where the skaters that had taken up the empty couch leave as soon as they see that Deanna’s has returned and has company.

“So it’s not broken?” Thursday’s Angel sounds almost relieved.

“No, docs said I should be good to go in a few days so long as I take it easy. Taking it easy is what I do, you know, not engaging in potentially dangerous competitive sports.”

“Right, um, yeah,”

“So are we going to properly introduce ourselves, or should I just call you Thursday’s Angel?”

“Castielle,” she blushes again, “My name is Castielle.”

“Casti-what now?” Deanna stumbles over the name.

“Castielle, I was named after the Angel of Thursday.”

“Right, I’m just going to call you Cas,” Thursday’s–Cas looks like she’s about to say something but chooses instead to not say anything.

“So where’s the rest of your team? And why aren’t you drinking?” Deanna asks, wondering briefly how long it’ll take for the pain meds to kick in again, the pain is a little distracting.

“I don’t drink,” Cas says matter of fact, “and my team mates are around her somewhere.”

“No drinking, wow, you Angels really are virtuous.”

Cas looks like she’s biting back a laugh, and for some reason Deanna really wants to get it out of her.

A few people stop by and say hello to Deanna, eyes wide when they see who’s sitting with her. Most of them are too stunned to actually see a member of Heavenly Hostess outside of the rink, and they hardly acknowledge Castielle outside of a nod in greeting and goodbye. It’s as if eye contact is strictly out of bounds. It amuses Deanna to no end.

“You really put a lot of effort into throwing this event, don’t you? I can tell the derby community is really grateful for it,” Cas says.

“It’s nothing, we like doing it,” Deanna replies, because it’s the truth.

“There aren’t a lot of people out there who would be willing to do what you do.”

Deanna honest to goodness blushes. Castielle doesn’t know her, yet she’s singing Deanna’s praises like Deanna created roller derby itself.

“So how come half these people are afraid of you?” Deanna says, it’s easier when she doesn’t have to talk about herself.

“Afraid?” Cas asks, her head tilting in confusion.

“Hardly any of them would look at you properly just now. It’s like they were afraid you were capable of calling down God’s wrath on them.”

“That’s ridiculous, we’re not actually angels, you know.”

“It’s figurative,” Deanna says, rolling her eyes. “Seriously though, it’s like everyone here doesn’t know if they’re allowed to look at you, let alone interact. Seems like you guys really have them traumatized, they’re afraid you’ll beat them like you do on that track.”

“It’s not our intention, I assure you.”

Deanna doesn’t know if its her place to mention what Charlie told her about Heavenly Hostess and their anti-social, holier-than-thou vibe they have surrounding them, but she figures she might as well. Deanna never was known for being particularly tactful in social settings.

A small frown mars Cas’ face at the rumors. “Do you think people really think that?”

Deanna shrugs, “I guess it is like finding out your favorite actor is a huge dick in real life, kind of ruins the whole on a pedestal image.”

“You think I’m a dick?” Cas deadpans, worry obvious in her voice.

Deanna laughs at that, “I think you’re clueless as to what this derby thing is really about.”

“And what is that?”

The bathroom conversation Deanna overheard comes rushing back to her. Cas’ complete innocence about that roller derby community’s values, taking it only as far as equating winning to be enough.

“It’s about having fun. It’s about that sense of community. That you don’t have to be the best on that track to have a good time, or to make friends with your idols, because your idols started at the bottom too, and they worked hard to get to where they are. And there’s that hope, that maybe if you work hard enough, you’ll be there someday, too. Sure, winning is great, but it’s the whole experience of having been on that track that’s the real reward. Ask anyone out on that track, they’ll tell you the same,” Deanna can’t believe she’s going on about the idealistic values of roller derby. It’s something that Sammy would do, not Deanna. Yet somehow, with Cas sitting beside her, she wants to show that what she does on that track means something even when you don’t win.

Cas is silent for a moment, taking it all in.

Deanna looks around; from their corner she can see people gathered in groups, laughing and honestly having a good time. It’s as if she’s seeing this community of roller derby girls through a new lens. It’s a little rose tinted, but it’s nice to enjoy something without having to think about its shortcomings.

“I–thank you for that Deanna.”

“Anytime.”

Deanna doesn’t remember falling asleep, but one moment she’s sitting on the couch, entertaining a pretty girl, and the next Sammy is waking her up and she has a crick in her neck from the awkward angle that she dozed off in.

“What’s going on?” she slurs, sleep clinging to her and making everything fuzzy.

“You fell asleep, on Thursday’s Angel,” Sammy says, with a grin.

“I, oh, Cas, where’d she go?” Deanna says, suddenly awake and groans when she jars her injured shoulder that she’d forgotten about.

“Everyone’s gone, time for you to go sleep in a real bed. And ‘Cas,’ is it?”

“Oh shut up, her name’s Cas-ti-elle, or something, shit’s a mouthful, it’s like calling you Samantha all the freaking time, and I know how much you hate that.”

Sammy pulls her infamous bitch face, and heaves Deanna to her feet. The rink needs to be cleaned up, but they’ll do that in the morning before everyone returns for the next day of the tournament.

 

The next day Deanna is willing to bear Sammy’s teasing about Cas, because frankly, she’s pretty excited to get to talk to Cas again.

She vaguely recalls something about Cas saying that she’d been excited about coming to the tournament because she wanted to meet Deanna and the rest of the team. Deanna just hopes she didn’t make too much of an idiot of herself in her medicated state, but that fear is forgotten when Heavenly Hostess arrives and Cas makes a beeline for her.

Deanna can’t help her smile. She sees that Cas is accompanied by two of her teammates, the redheaded Anna and the short Gaby.

“Hello Deanna,” Cas says.

“Hi Cas.” Could they be more awkward? The answer is yes, definitely, because apparently Gaby is of the ‘older relative so it’s my duty to embarrass you’ type.

“You’re right Cassie, her eyes really are like emeralds this close.”

“I never said that.”

Deanna doesn’t know whether to laugh or say something witty in return.

“Stop being so obnoxious,” Anna intervenes. “I’m Anna, by the way, and this is Gaby. You’re free to ignore her.”

“Uh, right, I’m Deanna,” Deanna says. She doesn’t know where all the fear of the team came from, they’re just as strange and dorky as the rest of the girls who find a calling in roller derby. And their ease around each other reminds Deanna of Team Free Wheel, and how they probably wouldn’t be half as good if they weren’t able to tease each other mercilessly.

“We know, Cassie’s told us all about you and your charms.”

Cas is blushing, her cheeks pink.

“Anyway, we just wanted to come by and meet you,” Anna continues, “And thank you for the opportunity to skate against so many new teams before playoffs.”

“And to give you our blessing,” Gaby says, nodding toward Cas on whom she barely has an arm around her shoulders from which Cas is trying to extract herself. Anna all but pulls Gaby off Cas before they wave and leave them alone.

“Well that was sufficiently awkward.”

“I apologize for Gaby, she doesn’t know how to act appropriately in public.”

“It’s okay, derby bouts are about the only chance half my teams gets for actually being in public,” Deanna jokes.

Cas smiles and Deanna can’t believe that they already have something that feels like an actual friendship between them after so little time spent together. Which is weird, because Deanna can’t remember the last time she made an actual friend was. It’s kind of sad really.

It isn’t until after the semi-final scrimmage, before Heavenly Hostess is supposed to get on the track for the finals against Blade Runners, the Hellbladers had been eliminated in the previous round, that Deanna gets a chance to talk to Cas again.

“So will you be staying for the after party? I mean, if you thought last night was fun, wait until you see what’s in store for tonight,” Deanna asks, excitement in her voice.

“I’d really like that,” Cas says hesitantly, an unspoken “but” hangs in the air.

“But?” Deanna says, failing spectacularly to not sound like a disappointed kid at Christmas. She had really looked forward to spending a night with Cas that wasn’t limited to sitting on a lumpy couch in the corner.

“We really should be heading back, Naomi doesn’t like for us to get too backlogged with our practices, bouts in between or not,” Cas says quickly, as if that’ll make the admission hurt any less.

“Not even to celebrate? Its not like we don’t already know that your team is going to win, right?” Deanna says weakly, somehow she knows that Naomi isn’t the kind to budge.

Cas presses her lips together in a grimace.

“That’s not the end of it, is it?”

“Naomi only let us stay last night because we’d kind of kept the whole extent of the party from her.”

“Seriously? What are you, seven years old? Can’t she trust you grown-ass women to handle a few drinks? It’s not even a school night,” Deanna says, attempting to add some levity to their conversation, but she can’t help the knot of disappointment in her stomach.

“We pushed our luck doing it. Anna would be in it big time if Gaby hadn’t stepped in to and taken some of Naomi’s brunt. She prefers that we focus on what we came here to do and not get distracted by everything else.”

“No fraternizing with the enemy?” Deanna jokes, but it falls flat, too close to the truth.

“She thinks friendships only make us likely to do dumb things on the track, and can I really challenge her? She’s gotten us this far,” Cas says, and she’s not even meeting Deanna’s eyes anymore.

Deanna can’t quite believe what she’s hearing. After the conversation she overheard in the restroom she is ready to accept that fact that Cas actually believes half the shit that Naomi is feeding her. It makes Deanna’s little speech about community and having a good time seem laughable, and Deanna would laugh at herself if she didn’t feel like a fool. Somehow she can’t even bring herself to keep trying to convince Cas to stay.

“It was nice meeting you, Deanna. I’ll see you at playoffs?” Cas says softly, kissing Deanna on the cheek and before Deanna can process the fact that Cas just kissed her, Cas is lost in the crowd as quickly as she appeared.

Deanna is left to stand in stunned silence. She feels as if someone just broke up with her and she didn’t even know they were dating. The fact that she’s pining after Cas so shortly after meeting her doesn’t bode well, like one of those passions that Deanna throws herself into feet first without checking to see where she’ll land.

Of course the only remedy is to drown herself in alcohol, lots of it.

Deanna forgoes all warnings about mixing painkillers with alcohol– it’s not like she has a bout to compete in the next day– and decides to get wasted.

“Hey, have you seen the Angels?” Charlie asks her about halfway through the night. Charlie thinks it’s amusing to rename the Heavenly Hostess, since she thought their team name was too snobbish, but suddenly Deanna thinks it’s apt. Fucking Snobs is what the team should be called.

“They didn’t think our party was worth sticking around for, don’t want to mingle with us losers.”

“Wait, seriously?”

“Yeah Charlie, sorry, but you’re going to have to find Charlie’s Angels somewhere else,” Deanna says, laughing her head off at her own joke, because sober she’s hilarious, but drunk she’s a fucking riot.

“You don’t think they got into trouble right? Anna said their coach was a bit of a prude.”

Deanna can’t even bring herself to mention what Cas had said, instead she grabs another beer and goes off to find a willing derby girl to make out with. At this time of the party it shouldn’t be too hard.

 

The intervening weeks before playoffs pass slowly. Though there are training sessions every day, Deanna can’t help but feel despondent. It certainly doesn’t help that it’s starting to affect her skating. She tries not to let it show, but it’s hard to avoid knowing looks every time she stumbles on the track when she pulls out her cell phone.

She gave Cas her number in hopes that they would be able to maintain some sort of communication during those weeks and after, but their parting puts a different strain on things. Deanna stares at her phone every time it rings or beeps, hoping that its Cas and angry when it isn’t. Whether that anger is directed at Cas or at herself, she doesn’t try to know. And it’s not like Cas reciprocated with her own number. Deanna can’t even text Cas first even if she wanted to. Okay, maybe Charlie could acquire the number for her, but at this point Deanna doesn’t even know if it’s worth the effort.

“Excited for playoffs?” Bobby asks over dinner. And it’s a strange occurrence for Bobby to ask about derby, because he knows that those conversations can go at length and its pretty much what everyone talks about anyway without his encouragement.

“Huh? Oh yeah, yeah,” Deanna says distractedly. She tries to ignore the way Bobby is looking at her, and if she looked up she would see the meaningful glance pass between Bobby and Sam.

“Geeze, you sound like someone keyed the Impala. What’s up?”

“Nothing. I’m great. Just tired, we had a tough training session, right Sammy?” Deanna glares at her sister.

“Yeah, pretty tiring stuff.”

But if anything that conversation only serves to have Sammy corner her in their shared bathroom just before bed.

“Do you want to tell me what’s going on?”

“Nothing’s going on.”

“Clearly there is. You haven’t been right since the tournament, did something happen?”

“I’m _fine_. Honestly.”

“Is this about Cas?”

“No.” But Deanna’s denial is too quick.

“What happened between you two?”

“Nothing, and there’s no ‘you two’ we just met, I don’t know her.”

“Just don’t let it get you down, you’re half the reason any of us do this. You know we’re not a team if you’re not in it.”

“Way to put that on a person, Sammy.”

“I’m serious though. You’re our best cheerleader, don’t let us lose that just because some girl with pretty eyes doesn’t value you. If she couldn’t see the good in you than she’s not worth being hung up about.”

“Cas isn’t just some girl.”

“Well okay, just don’t let it get in the way.”

“Is this some type of bros before hoes conversation?”

Sammy shrugs, “Maybe it is.”

“I gotcha Sammy. Just go to bed, I’m fine.”

And there’s at least a little honesty in the last statement. Sammy’s right, Deanna thinks, just because Cas doesn’t think that having fun is the best part of roller derby doesn’t mean that Deanna should let that thought get in the way of how her team works.

 

A lot of teams make their way out to Sioux Falls for the pre-playoff tournament, but playoffs are more centrally located to give teams in the WBTDA North Central division an equal commute. Team Free Wheel gets three rooms at a Super 8 down the street from the skating rink in Ohio, where the weeklong playoffs event takes place. Most of the visiting teams get rooms in the same or neighboring motels, such that its usual to run into several teams even off the track. Deanna likes to refer to it as their own Olympic neighborhood, except of course the girls here are much cuter and way more badass.

“We have to go check in first,” Pamela announces after they check in and split up into their respective rooms.

They all pile into the Impala and head over the Ohio league’s roller derby warehouse. It’s one of the biggest that Deanna’s ever been to, and it never ceases to get her excited about the events to come. There are already tons of teams milling around, stopping to chat with teams that didn’t make it out to the pre-playoff tournament, or just reuniting after the short intervening weeks.

Deanna looks around, half hoping that she won’t run into Cas, and half hoping that she will.

“Hey,” Sammy says, snapping Deanna to attention.

“What’s up?”

“You okay?”

“Yeah, great.”

“Don’t get hung up about her too much, we’ll get through the week, okay?”

“Not this again.”

“Come on, I know that it bothers you, but we can’t help it if not everyone sees stuff the way we do.”

“Wow, okay, suddenly you’re lecturing me on the gruesome reality of life?”

“Just don’t scare her off, I think she might be a little…conflicted.”

“What’s there to be conflicted about? They’re stuck up, whether they want to admit it or not. I don’t have to pander to their freaking egos, okay?”

Deanna goes outside to wait for the rest of team. She’s angry that she blew up at Sam like that. It’s not her fault that despite the good vibes she was getting from Cas, the Heavenly Hostess skater turned out to be a bit of a prick.

She’s so caught up in being angry she doesn’t even notice the arrival of several teams, until a voice startles her.

“Hello Deanna.”

Deanna scrambles to not fall off the hood of the Impala. She glares at Cas before promptly ignoring her.

“Are you angry with me?” Cas whispers, and Deanna wouldn’t have been able to hear her if Cas wasn’t standing in her personal space.

“What do you think?” Deanna bites back.

“I’m sorry if I did something to offend you.”

“No, of course you didn’t, I just didn’t think you wanted to be seen fraternizing with us common skater folk, might distract you from the true mission at hand.”

“Oh.”

“If there’s anything else you had to say better say it now before Naomi comes over and punishes you for getting dirt on your spotless uniform,” Deanna says, climbing off the Impala and making a move to go inside.

“Deanna, wait,” Cas says, a hand reaching out to grab Deanna’s shoulder. The grip is soft enough that if Deanna wanted to she could slip by easily. “Can I at least explain?”

“You know, I wanted to give you girls the benefit of the doubt, but you’re stuck up just like every other upstart team that’s tried to come in here with their thousand dollar sponsorships,” Deanna shrugs off Cas’ grip.

“I’ve thought a lot about what you said these past few weeks.”

“Are you trying to apologize? Because usually that includes the words ‘I’m sorry’ and I’m not getting that from you.”

“I’m sorry.”

“I’m not, I meant those things I said. I’m the one that should be sorry for thinking that you were any different.”

“I am though, different.”

Deanna looks at Cas, and the other girl gets the hint to elaborate.

“Things have changed for me, I’ve changed. You were right, and I’ve had doubts as to why I’m doing this. It was easy, in the beginning. We were winning, and people liked us. And I guess I didn’t notice at the time that people started seeing us as…different. It wasn’t until you pointed it out that night, that people were almost afraid of us. I didn’t–I don’t want that. I’ve seen the way you are with people, and I admire that about you, and maybe I want to try to be something like that.”

Deanna doesn’t know where this trust comes from, that Cas feels like she can tell Deanna everything. But it’s been there since before they had a proper conversation, when Cas helped her on the track.

“I want to be able to show you that I’ve changed, and maybe you can help me. I don’t want to be that person that I was during the tournament, at least not completely.”

Deanna nods. She can’t really deny someone’s cry for help, and if Cas is telling the truth about being different, well there’s a part of her that really wants to believe it.

“I’ll–I’ll see you around?” there’s a tentative tone to Cas’ question, as if she’s asking if Deanna will want to still be around her.

“Yeah, Cas, anytime. You have my number.” Deanna gives her a lopsided smile.

“Right,” Cas waves before turning and disappearing into the building.

 

“Introducing Team Free Wheel, from the Sioux Falls Roller On league. Now a lot of you were probably at their famous, or should I say, infamous, pre-playoff tournament a few weeks ago. This team made their way up from nowhere, and I dare say they’ve stolen our hearts, those girls sure know how to put on a good show, and throw a good after party, I think I’m still slightly hung over.

“We have number 1967, Chevy Impala who plays jammer, next up number 84, Jesse’s Girl, I think we all wish we had a girl like her. Number C3PO, Queen of Moondor, number 837 Bend It Like Braeden, and number 99 Psychic Prowess!”

Team Free Wheel is introduced onto the track, and they warm up on the track while the other team is being announced, running a few blocking plays while Deanna attempts to pass them. There is a certain kind of exhilaration from skating when people are watching and cheering. Deanna gets a few wolf whistles from the crowd, and while whistles are normally banned during the normal play of the game, Deanna smiles and waves to the crowd. Its difficult to make out anyone other than the announcers in the announcer booth, their faces lit up from their desk lamps, but otherwise the bright lights that illuminate the banked derby track make it difficult to distinguish faces in the dark mass of people in the stands.

Division 1 playoff scrimmages are set up so that the thirty-two teams in the North Central division who qualified play their first round in the span of two days, then a day of break, followed by two more days of playing, another day off, and then the last day of intense skating that determines the three top teams who pass onto the championship.

And while the matches are scattered throughout the day, it’s difficult to watch matches that are also on the same day that a team is competing. Deanna checked the brackets, and she knows that Heavenly Hostess won’t be competing until tomorrow.

Deanna can’t help but wonder if Cas is there in the stands, watching. She knows that any good team would scope out the potential competition, it’s part of the reason they host their pre-playoff tournament at Singer Skates. It’s also a chance to mingle with the crowd. Deanna has met a range of enthusiastic fans, from young girls looking up to derby dolls as heroes and athletic inspirations, to families supporting their loved ones, like the burly Benny who never fails to miss a bout his wife Andrea is competing in, to other derby enthusiasts. If Cas was serious about what she’d said earlier, that’s where she’ll be.

They win their first match against Chicago’s Windy Wheelers. Deanna is lost in the aftermath of their victory, with many people coming up to them and congratulating them on getting on step closer to championships, or other fans wanting a picture, and she forgets about trying to look for Cas in the stands.

While there are the usual food trucks and other food and drink booths at the skating warehouse, playoffs are usually a lot more laid back until the official closing after party, and most teams just hang out at the surrounding bars and clubs. The late match leaves the team hungry and sweaty, and they decide to head back to their motel to shower and then meet up for dinner at the nearby diner.

 

There’s insistent knocking on the door as Deanna steps out of the shower. Knowing Sammy, the girl probably forgot something that she needed before leaving, and Deanna opens the door without checking to see who it is.

“What did you for–Oh.”

Castielle is on the other side of the door.

“What are you doing here?” Deanna asks, and she doesn’t mean to sound so rude.

“I heard you were staying here and wanted to come by and congratulate you on your win, if that’s okay with you,” Cas says, and Deanna can hear the uncertainty in her voice. Cas is visibly uncomfortable, as if she doesn’t know if she’s pushing the limits of some boundary that was established during their last conversation.

“I, yeah, sure, come in. Although I’m supposed to meet Sam and the rest of the girls for dinner in a bit,” Deanna says, gauging Cas’ reaction as she dries her damp hair with the towel. Cas looks around the room, skating gear is tossed in one corner, and even though they haven’t been here one night, Deanna’s bed is an unmade mess.

“Did you, uh, want to come along?”

Cas smiles wide, “I’d love to.”

“Your coach won’t get mad?”

Cas shakes her head and shrugs, Deanna vaguely wonders where this new care-free attitude came from, but she’ll take anything at this point.

The diner is only a block away so they walk over, and when they get there Sam waves them over to where they’re already seated.

“Hope there’s room for one more,” Deanna says, shoving into the booth with Sammy and pushing her over.

“I hope I’m not intruding,” Cas says, all politeness.

“Don’t even worry about it,” Lisa says with a smile, and there’s a knowing glint in her eye.

“I don’t think there’s any need for introductions, you all know who Cas is.”

“Sure do.”

There’s a level of uncertainty hovering around the table until their waiter comes over to take their order.

“I’ll have a bacon cheeseburger, with onion rings,” Deanna says, smiling wide at the cute waiter. He blushes under her gaze.

“I’ll have the same,” Cas says, handing her menu back to the waiter that Deanna’s forgotten, because there are some things that are a must in Deanna’s list of the perfect woman, and an appreciation for the greasy diner food is definitely high on the list.

Sam raises her eyebrows and looks meaningfully at Deanna before she says, “Are ordering overly large burgers a jammer inside secret that we haven’t been let in on?”

“Their portion sizes are quite big, but I find that a hard day of skating usually requires the calorie intake in a burger such as this.”

The girls look around, not sure if Cas is joking, but despite only knowing Cas marginally better than the rest of the girls, Deanna lets herself laugh.

When their food arrives Cas digs into her burger with an enthusiasm only paralleled by Deanna, and Deanna decides right there that Cas is kind of perfect.

“How have playoffs been so far? Your team doesn’t skate until tomorrow, I understand?” Pamela asks, their plates mostly cleared of food.

“Our first match will be against the Ohio team who’s hosting, but we were able to spend today watching the other games, and it was very enjoyable.”

“Oh, so did you get to watch us play?” Charlie says.

“Yes, your team is very skilled, but of course that’s to be expected. This is your third year at playoffs, right?”

Charlie and Sam exchange a look between them that Deanna knows is due in part to the fact that they are such fans of Heavenly Hostess and have been following them almost obsessively, that it seems crazy to find that a member of that team would know enough about their team to randomly fact drop.

“Yeah it is,” Sam says, “We were excited that your team qualified for playoffs your first year.”

“We were too.”

“We know you girls had to play a lot of games to even qualify, how are you not burnt out?” Lisa asks.

“There was a lot of incentive to keep playing, we really wanted to make it at least to playoffs, and our coach was really great at helping us make that happen.”

The rest of the time is spent in a similar fashion, Charlie and Sam instigating a sort of Q&A with Cas answering, and Deanna knows she’s trying hard to be good about her answers. If anything, her answers show Deanna that Cas is also viewing her derby experience in a different way. They don’t make it back to their motel until the after the dishes have been long cleared from their table.

 

“Sorry about my teammates back there, they can be pretty big fan-girls at the best of times, and come across as kind of stalker-ish other times.”

“Not at all, I like them. Their enthusiasm for the sport is evident. You have a good team behind you.”

“Don’t let them hear you say that.”

“And I was flattered that they knew so much about our team, I didn’t think our team was that worthy to be followed so carefully, it’s humbling actually.”

They’re sitting on the hood of the Impala, the dim glow from the motel casting them in dramatic shadows. Deanna wonders if any of the girls are trying to spy on them.

“I watched your bout, earlier today,” Cas says again.

“What did you think?”

“I think I could watch you skate forever.”

“You’re making me blush, Cas,” Deanna says, suddenly grateful for the poor lighting to hide her actual blush.

“And I met a few of your fans.”

“Did you really?” the thought of having actual self-proclaimed fans makes Deanna grin like an idiot.

Cas nods, “They were very enthusiastic.”

“Most derby fans are.”

“Yes, even the ones cheering for the other team didn’t abstain from cheering at the end.”

“Even the fans know it’s not always about the winning.”

There conversation is filled with silences, but Deanna doesn’t feel the need to speak. There’s something about Cas’ mere presence that speaks volumes.

“Thank you, for tonight. You didn’t have to invite me to come along.”

“Don’t worry about it.”

“Will I see you tomorrow?”

“I hope so, Cas.”

 

The next day Deanna and the rest of Team Free Wheel make it over to the skating rink to watch the matches. Deanna is excited to watch Heavenly Hostess, even though their match won’t be until later in the day and they aren’t likely to see any of them under after the match, if they’re lucky.

There’s a heightened buzz of excitement surrounding the track before the match, there are a lot of teams and fans present who still have not watched Heavenly Hostess compete. They’re up against the hosting team, a team who has advanced to Championships for the past five years, so the set up promises a good match.

Deanna watches as Heavenly Hostess spends the first quarter playing offense and adapting to whatever the Ohio team throws their way. She’s especially caught up watching Cas on the track, and if her reasons for skating have changed, it hasn’t changed the intensity with which she skates.

Heavenly Hostess take the match, their winning margin not as wide as they had been at playoffs, but they still manage to make a few jaws drop. Deanna waits around after the teams leave the track for the dressing rooms. There’s a hope that Cas will make good on her promise about seeing each other today again, and Deanna really wants to see her.

She’s distracted again and doesn’t notice Cas until she’s right next to her.

“How do you have this knack for sneaking up on me?”

“It’s not very hard when there are this many people, I assure you I was not being particularly quiet just to sneak up on you.”

Deanna thought Cas would still be in her derby clothes, but she’s changed back into some jeans and a t-shirt and looks so normal it kind of throws her off.

“What do you say we get out of here and get ourselves some burgers from that drive-thru place down the street?” Deanna says, getting into Cas’ personal space to be heard above the sounds of the crowded rink.

“I’d say that I’m agreeable to the idea.”

There’s a giddy feeling in Deanna’s stomach as she leads Cas over to her car and they decide to sit in the Impala parked outside the motel.

There’s a comfortable lull in the conversation as the two girls finish up their burgers.

Deanna doesn’t know how they got to this point in their conversation, but anything with Cas is kind of out of the norm. Deanna had been pointing out a few of the derby girls that Cas might have watched the previous day, and commenting on how cute they were. And it might have slipped that Deanna knew them a bit more intimately than a meeting on the tracks would warrant. It’s not that she’s easy, but she isn’t one to need a promise for something more to keep her from having a good time. Cas’ blushing make Deanna suspect that Cas might not be of the same persuasion.

“So what, you saving yourself til marriage?” Deanna teases.

Cas continues to blush, “No, I guess I just never had occasion.”

“Occasion? No one setting your loins ablaze?”

“Let’s just say that my…amorous preferences haven’t always been looked upon with good grace.”

All the humor goes from Deanna, “Oh, um, I know the feeling.”

Cas raises an eyebrow.

“I didn’t come out to my family properly until after my dad, uh, passed away.”

“My family has an inkling, and its something that can usually be ignored. Thankfully Gaby’s wild antics usually overshadow anything I’ve done.”

“So roller derby, that one of Gaby’s wild antics as well?”

Cas laughs, “Yeah I suppose it is. But our parents were surprisingly okay with it.”

“I guess they just didn’t know much about the derby scene otherwise they wouldn’t have let you.”

“That’s why Naomi’s here, to keep us in line.”

“And yet here you are, being seduced by a derby girl in her big black car.”

“Oh is that what you’re doing? Seducing me?”

“This would be a lot easier if you’d actually let me.”

“And what does ‘letting you’ involve?”

“Certainly not something your family would approve of.”

“Tell me, are you always this smooth when you flirt with someone.”

“Only if they’re as cute as you are.”

Cas laughs, and Deanna thinks that its something she wouldn’t mind hearing a whole lot more of. It’s certainly different than the persona that Cas is on the track, from Thursday’s Angel who’s all business and no play, despite the business being the play.

There’s the initial glancing at each other’s lips, but whether Cas is conscious that she’s looking at Deanna’s lips is not as certain as the fact that Deanna is making sure to lick or bite her lips every time she catches Cas looking. It’s a cat and mouse game, except the stakes are a lot lower, and Deanna wouldn’t really mind being caught.

She’s the one who leans in for the kiss, but Deanna is willing to bet her car that Cas is the one who closes the final distance between their lips. The kiss is soft, nothing rushed and insistent about it, like they have all the time in the world to get to know the lines of each other’s mouths.

They pull away, Deanna gauging Cas’ reaction, and even in the dimness of the car she can see that Cas’ pupils are blown wide, she’s sure she’s not faring any better.

“I’d really like to do that again,” Cas whispers. Deanna’s only response is to lean over again and kiss Cas again. Cas’ offers no resistance, her lips following Deanna’s, and when Deanna ventures out to lick at her lips, Cas opens her mouth and lets Deanna deepen the kiss. Hands are tangled in hair, and there’s an ache between Deanna’s legs for something more, but she pushes it aside. She could kiss Cas forever, and not have anything more, and it would be enough.

That night, Deanna can still feel a tingle on her lips, she wonders if kissing Cas is always that thunderous.

 

They don’t see each other for the day in between the rounds of matches. While some teams use that day to rest, others choose to get to the track and work on anything they might think will help them for the next round of qualifications. Team Free Wheel falls in the latter category. They work on one of their blocking moves that had been a little weak during their first match. And because blocking is not really Deanna’s job on the track, she spends a lot of her time thinking about Cas.

Sam jokes that she has a lovelorn look on her face. Deanna tells her to kindly fuck off.

The next day the Heavenly Hostess beat out the Hellbladers in an impressive bout. There had been a lot of speculation previously, what with the Hellbladers being one of the more prominent teams in South Dakota, along with Team Free Wheel, which team would be the ones to face off with the formidable Angels. But with the Hellbladers cast into the opposing bracket of Team Free Wheel, it would be chance that would have both teams play against Heavenly Hostess.

What a lot of people weren’t betting on was the happenstance that Heavenly Hostess would not only compete against the Hellbladers and win, but that the final round of bouts would bring Heavenly Hostess up against Team Free Wheel, that is if Team Free Wheel was able to make it to the final round.

“Your girlfriend is scary,” Lisa turns to her during the match between the angels and the skaters from hell.

Deanna can’t help but smile, “She’s not my girlfriend, but yeah, she’s super intimidating.”

“You do realize that when they win this, and we win, it’ll mean that we have to face them?”

Deanna didn’t know if she should be grateful that she was being spared having to face the Hellbladers (the pain of a dislocated shoulder haunted her dreams) or be afraid that she would have to go up against Heavenly Hostess.

“You know, this is the type of stuff that happens in romantic comedies. It’s like Romeo and Juliet,” Charlie says from the other side of Lisa.

“And who am I supposed to be?” Deanna asks, engaging them in their joke.

“Romeo, of course,” Sam says, and Deanna knows she’s in it now.

“If I’m Romeo does that make you Mercutio?” Deanna asks. “You gonna die to protect me?”

“Not in the slightest,” Sammy laughs, shoving Deanna aside so she can fit between her and Charlie.

“Stop biting your thumb at me,” Charlie says.

“I’m not biting my thumb at you,” Sammy retorts, thumb very obviously back between her teeth.

“Are you seriously quoting Shakespeare in an argument right now? God my teammates are such nerds. Remind me to lock up your books and laptops so you two can actually go outside and experience life.”

“You’re just mad that you’re Romeo, out to woo the innocent Juliet.”

“Didn’t they have sex at one point? Like, days after meeting?” Pamela pipes up.

“Oh great, now you’re in on the conversation too?”

“They totally did,” Charlie laughs.

“My nonexistent love life is being compared to Shakespeare, someone shoot me now.”

“So you and Cas haven’t had sex, is what I’m getting from this?” Lisa says with a smile.

“Wow, seriously? Why the sudden interest?”

“Charlie has a bet going.”

“Seriously?”

Charlie shrugs, nonchalant about the fact that she may or may not have started a betting pool on the sex life of her fellow teammate. “In full disclosure, it was only after Anna mentioned that Gaby had the idea going on. Something about Cas finally removing that chastity belt, and maybe something about a purity ring? I’m not sure if that part was actually true though.”

“Do Cas and I get any say in this?”

“You’re not allowed to bet, that’s like cheating.”

“Are we forgetting the matter at hand here? We’re facing them in two days time. Can we focus on how we’re going to beat them?”

 

“Did you know anything about a betting pool?” Deanna asks Cas as they take their seats on the top of the Impala’s hood later that night.

“I thought people weren’t allowed to bet on the games, this isn’t horse racing.”

“Not on the bout, on _us_.”

“Why would people be betting on us? And for what exactly?”

“Exactly, they’re betting on _us_ , and whether or not, we, I–“ Deanna can’t believe she’s actually being embarrassed about sex. It’s one thing to _hint_ at it, but to flat out say it without sounding like you’re propositioning someone is shaky ground.

“Engage in coitus?”

“Coitus, really?”

“I have an extensive vocabulary, would you prefer another word?”

“Sex, just call it sex like a normal person. Who uses coitus anymore?”

Cas looks like she’s about to respond so Deanna waves her off, “They’re betting on whether or not we’ll have sex before the week is out.”

“Why?”

“Because apparently our teammates, yes, I said _our_ , have nothing better to do.”

“Who?”

“Gaby, and Anna, she mentioned it to Charlie who kind of went with the idea and it snowballed from there.”

“I am not surprised that Gaby is behind all this. I’ll have a word with her.”

“No, it’s fine. It’s just, they wanted a good laugh.”

“Did you…did you make a bet?”

“What?”

“Do you think we’ll have sex before the week is out?”

Deanna sputters for words. She’s pretty sure that this would have been a spit-take if she’d been drinking anything. “I–what–no, why would I…?”

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable.”

“No, it’s not that, it’s just kind of like…I don’t know…” Deanna falters for words. How do you explain to someone with whom you’d very much like to have sex with at some point in your relationship, and there’s that word again, that most of your previous relationships have been purely sex and lasted no more than a few hours. And okay, Deanna isn’t the kind to fantasize about marriage and houses and the two-point-five kids, but the idea of spending the rest of her life next to someone has become steadily more appealing the longer Cas and whatever they had going on between them kept being something they had between them.

And kissing Cas is nice. For once Deanna doesn’t feel the need to speed things up. Sure, they’ve only got the week of playoffs guaranteed, but somehow Deanna feels like she’s got the rest of time to be with Cas. It’s ridiculous, she knows, to be feeling this much for someone she knows so little about.

“I’ve never been one for actual relationships, the fact that I’m admitting this to you is kind of a big deal for me actually. There’s usually a pretty solid line between friend and fuck buddy, and most people in my life have fallen into one category or the other, and by most I mean all but one, who is now very firmly in the friend category, so I’m not very good at this…talking about… stuff,” Deanna says, she wonders of Cas is keeping up because even she doesn’t know the point she is trying to make. “I guess what I’m trying to say is my mind is super confused about where to put you right now.”

“Because we are not friends or because we are not having sex?”

Deanna laughs, “This is possibly one of the most awkward conversations that I’ve participated in, and I have had some weird conversations. And we’re totally friends Cas, I consider you my friend.”

Cas looks thoughtful.

“Can’t I just make a new category, label it ‘Cas’ and be done with it?” Deanna all but groans.

At that Cas jumps off the Impala and finds a stick from the nearby bush. Deanna watches as she very carefully draws two overlapping circles in the dirt of the motel parking lot. She labels one side ‘Friends’ and the other ‘Bed Friends,’ and in the space where the two circles overlap, she looks up at Deanna, then labels it with ‘Castielle.’

“I hope this is an accurate representation of the categories in your mind.”

“I think you hit the nail right in the head there, with a Venn diagram on the dirt of a motel parking lot no less. Somehow when I imagined this it didn’t involve…that.”

“You imagined this?”

“Not this, there’s a lot more kissing involved in my mind.”

“I think we can fix that.”

 

There’s the new exhilaration that comes from discovering something for the first time, and there’s a hint of addiction in it as well. That’s what Cas’ kisses are like.

And while Cas isn’t in the whole Catholic school girl get up, her angelic derby costume that she practices in is a very nice alternative.

They’re supposed to be training a little, and resting a lot, but Deanna finds her time could be better employed in discovering the little noises Cas makes when she kisses her in different places. Cas seems to be like-minded.

Deanna is trying to contain herself, but Cas paints such an enticing picture, with her kiss-swollen lips, and blue eyes darkened by dilated pupils, her wavy hair a disheveled mess where Deanna has had her hand in it.

They’ve snuck away from their teams and wandered off to Deanna’s motel. And though they’ve done nothing more than engage in some heavy petting, clothes have stayed mostly on.

“I want to make this good for you.”

“It’s with you Deanna, I think good will go without saying.”

“You have a lot of confidence in me.”

“You’ve never given me a reason not to.”

Deanna goes slow, letting Cas undress her. There’s no rush, and they take time to kiss every part of newly exposed skin. Cas is not shy in her nudity, and when she pauses to take in Deanna’s bare form, the pure awe in her face removes any shyness Deanna might have had.

She takes care to let Cas find her pleasure, Cas crying out Deanna’s name in small whimpers, grasping at Deanna’s shoulders, bringing her down for kisses. And when it’s Deanna’s turn, Cas lets Deanna guide her, learning from Deanna and reciprocating tenfold.

In the end Deanna is sure she’s never felt that way for anyone before. It should terrify her, but she only feels exhilarated. 

 

Deanna’s face must be an open book for all the success she has at hiding the fact that yes, she and Cas have engaged in coitus.

“You know when we mentioned the bet it wasn’t supposed to be a challenge,” Sammy says.

“You do realize who you’re talking to.”

“As long as you stayed on your side of the room, I don’t really want to know.”

“Wellll,” Deanna says, Sammy throws a pillow at her.

 

The last day of the matches are brutal. Deanna hardly has a chance to know what Heavenly Hostess is doing because she’s so caught up in her own match. And it’s not a match that is going well. There are only four teams competing today, and only the top three teams will make the cut for championships. Those teams are taken from the two teams who make it to finals, and the third team is taken from the semi-final teams who scored the most in their respective matches. So it’s not like Team Free Wheel has to actually win their match, or make it to finals, they just have to make sure to score enough points.

And even though they try their best, they don’t make it to finals. The high points they scored has Deanna and the rest of the team waiting anxiously to find what the other team scored against Heavenly Host.

Deanna lets herself believe that Team Free Wheel might have a chance to make the cut for Championships this year. Despite knowing it’s a bad idea, she allows herself a glimmer of hope, but it dies as soon as the announcement is made and Team Free Wheel is out of the running. Her stomach twists up into a knot, and she can hardly make herself smile when Charlie and Sammy hug her. It makes Deanna wish she hadn’t been so invested in actually making it to Championships. She hates herself for thinking that she had any right to believe that just because they’ve made it the past two years, there was no guarantee that they would have to make it this year. Sure, their team is loved, but that doesn’t equate to skill on the field.

If only she’d scored more points, skated faster, not let the other teams block her so easily…

“Hey, stop beating yourself up, we played a good game, I think that speaks for itself. So the other teams scored a few more points, we did our best out there, and damn if I wouldn’t do it all again in a heartbeat,” Pam’s speech is lost on Deanna, she wants nothing more than go back to their motel room and yell into a pillow, maybe lock herself in the bathroom so that Sammy doesn’t hear her cry. Because the only thing worse than being a loser is being a sore loser.

“There’s always next year, right?” the forced cheer in her voice when she replies fools no one, but they have enough pity on her to let it slide.

“Aren’t you sticking around to watch the final match?” Lisa asks when they’ve finished loading up the Impala with all their gear. “Heavenly Hostess made the cut, don’t you want to see them win this thing?”

“No, I’m just– I just want to get back to the motel and shower real quick, I feel extra sweaty and gross today,” Deanna lies. Lisa gives her a hug before letting her drive away.

She doesn’t bother unloading their gear from the Impala, they’ll be back on the road the next morning so there’s no point in lugging things back and forth. Deanna enters her room and sits on the bed, tugging her boots off without untying them and throwing them beside her with more force than is necessary. She throws herself back onto the bed, grabs the pillow and covers her face as she screams. Her eyes sting with tears, she raises a hand to wipe them away but it only makes her shed more tears.

“Pull it together, Deanna,” she growls to herself.

There’s knocking on her door not twenty minutes after she arrives, and Deanna almost doesn’t get up to answer. She’s been crying, and her puffy red eyes are not a good look on her. She goes to the door and peeks through the view hole. It’s Cas, and from the looks of it, she’s in a quite a state herself.

“Cas?”

“Can I come in?” Cas asks quickly, pushing past Deanna almost as fast.

“What’s wrong? Shouldn’t you be back at the track?” Deanna says, because she’s sure that the final match is supposed to be starting soon.

Cas paces the floor, “I’m bothering you, I should go, I shouldn’t burden you with my problems.”

“No, Cas, it’s okay, what’s wrong?” Deanna prompts again, “Talk to me.”

They sit down on opposite beds, Cas wringing her hands as if unsure if she should say anything at all, and half eyeing the door as if she expects someone to come bursting through any second.

“I didn’t know where else to go.”

It sounds a lot like what a runaway speech would start like, and suddenly Deanna goes from concerned to tell-me-now.

“Heavenly Hostess isn’t going to Championships.”

“Wait, what?” Deanna says, because she can’t have heard that clearly. Okay, so she had her little freak out while they announced the teams who qualified for championships, but she heard, as did everyone else standing in that skating rink, that Heavenly Hostess was the number one team who qualified for championships on a point basis. Even if they didn’t make it to the final match, Heavenly Hostess qualified to compete at Championships.

“Heavenly Hostess isn’t going to Championships,” Cas repeats, as if that alone is explanation enough.

Deanna waves her hand impatiently, “I get that, but why? Your team scored almost twice as many points as the other teams who qualified.”

Cas sighs, “Heavenly Hostess isn’t going to Championships because Heavenly Hostess, the roller derby team, no longer exists, or won’t exist as of the end of playoffs.”

Deanna can’t believe what she’s hearing. There are a lot of reasons why roller derby teams break up: lack of sponsorship, lack of time, lack of will to continue playing. But qualifying for championships at the national level does not a good reason make.

“It wasn’t working out, some of us wanted out.”

“Some? You all agreed to this?”

“Did you know Anna got her own motel room? She didn’t even stay at the same hotel as we did. And Gaby almost didn’t show up at all. Rachel and Hester are the only ones who wanted to continue, but I think it’s just because Naomi is their mom, and it’s pretty hard to say no to your parents.”

Deanna doesn’t know what to do. Her maybe-girlfriend is having a breakdown, yet a part of her is wondering what happens to Team Free Wheel in the light of things.

“Deanna, I don’t know what to do.”

“It’s okay, we’ll figure this out, alright? I’ll go find Charlie and Pamela, they’ll know what to do. Charlie practically has the rulebook memorized. It’ll be fine.”

 

“Well, technically Heavenly Hostess is still an existing team, as far as the WBTDA goes. Nothing has been made official, is that right?”

The rest of Team Free Wheel is gathered in the motel room. Cas looks a lot calmer than when she’d first gone to Deanna, but there’s a lot of confusion still in the air. The rest of them had seen Heavenly Hostess take the track with Angelic Awakening as jammer, the team short a player. It had been very obvious who was missing. The call from Deanna didn’t leave them without a doubt as to where Thursday’s Angel had disappeared to.

“But if they do, what happens then?”

“Usually a team would be forfeit, since most of these things happen a lot closer to the start date of championships. No winning team foresees not going to championships, it’s things that happen in between which usually means that runner up teams don’t have enough time to be notified and the spot is just forfeited without a replacement runner-up team.”

“But?”

“But with the dissolution of Heavenly Hostess happening so in advance, there might be a chance that every team is bumped up one to fill the space.”

“So Team Free Wheel could qualify?”

“Yes. I can’t say for certain though, it’d really depend on the league representatives that are here today. Again, this is with the official word from Heavenly Hostess getting to them.”

Deanna knows it’s unfair of her to ask this of Cas, so the question remains unasked, hanging heavy in the air.

“I think I can talk to Anna and Gaby.”

“Cas,” Deanna wants to protest.

“Deanna, no, if anyone deserves to go to Championships its you and your team. Heavenly Hostess had a good run. Maybe it just happened to fast for us, we weren’t ready, we didn’t have the right spirit for it. But when I watched you all skate out there today, you have it. That’s something we can’t compete with.”

It’s then that Pamela speaks up, “Charlie, what’s the deal with changing team members for playoffs and championships?”

“As long as the team member is not already on a team that is participating in the event in any way, then a new member is allowed to come in a substitute for the other team member. It’s a clause that is meant for injured players more than anything,” Charlie explains, and the longer she goes on the realization dawns on her face.

“So, say if I said I was hurt… would Cas be able to take my spot on the team?”

Deanna looks on with wide eyes, she can’t believe what she’s hearing.

“As long as Cas made it very clear to the organization that Heavenly Hostess is no longer participating in the event, then I don’t see why they should find a problem with it.”

“What do you say, Cas, there’s a spot open in Team Free Wheel for you,” Pamela asks, and there are butterflies in Deanna’s stomach because Cas might be on their team.

“I…” Cas begins, but the way her eyes are darting everywhere make Deanna nervous, until Cas catches her eye. They stare at each other, uncertainty in both their faces. And that’s the thing, this thing between them, its been uncertain every step of the way. Tentative in the way they moved forward, but it was clear that they were both stumbling in the same general direction. “I would really like that, thank you.”

Deanna grins wide, and maybe if they weren’t surrounded by her teammates she would kiss Cas, but while Deanna isn’t entirely against PDA, there’s making out in front of strangers you’ll never see again, and there’s making out in front of your family who you have to live with.

“It’s us who should be thanking you, Cas,” Sam says, “Welcome to the team. And really, we wouldn’t be going to Championships if you hadn’t brought this opportunity to us.”

“It’s the least we can do,” Lisa agrees.

“You can, well Championships are still a while away, but you’re welcome to come stay with us, I mean you don’t have to,” Deanna asks, and it sounds a lot like she’s asking Cas to move in with her.

“I’ll have to speak with Naomi, and the rest of the team.”

 

The whole thing goes over as smoothly as something of this kind can go, in other words: it’s a bit of a mess. There’s anger thinly contained under the surface, which Deanna thinks is scarier than if they had just let go and yelled at each other.

Gaby and Anna are notably absent when they find Naomi at their high end hotel on the other side of town, and Deanna feels guilty about not asking Cas where she was staying and is amazed at the same time that Cas spent so many of her nights during the past week hanging out with Deanna at her cheap motel.

Deanna is the only one who actually goes with Cas up to their room, and while she’s supposed to be there more moral support, getting stared down by Naomi shakes her resolve.

“What do you think you’re doing Castielle, throwing away your life on joining some team that can’t even make it to the championships save on the coattails of another team’s downfall? Is that what you want?”

“It’s what I choose,” Cas says, all calmness, but Deanna can see the way she is clenching her jaw between her responses.

“What will your family say?”

“Whatever they have to say means little to the decision I’ve made to continue skating. I know its hard for you to see this, but in the past week I’ve found a new passion for skating that I didn’t even know existed inside me.”

“That passion is a poor substitute for winning.”

“Winning isn’t the point, it never should have been,” Cas says, and when she says it she looks at Deanna. Deanna feels as if her heart could explode over how far Cas had come. This is the same person who had once spewed what Naomi is saying now, but this is also a completely different person.

“I’m assuming this is her fault? Have you truly lost yourself, Castielle, have you forgotten who you are?”

“No, if anything I know who I am more than I ever have.”

“Do you really think you’ll be happy with a team like that?”

“I used to think that happiness was something that happened to people. I figured that if I waited long enough, it’d come to me as well. But now I can see that happiness is a lot like skating, you can watch it happen, or you can strap on your skates and chase after it. There’ll be a lot of bumps and scrapes along the way, but at the end, all that hard work is worth it. Because even if you don’t win, no one can take away the fact that you tried. And I think trying, well, that’s what happiness is.”

 

Deanna drives out with Cas to pick up just enough of her things to last the few weeks until Championships. There’s an unspoken agreement that for the meantime Cas will be moving in with Deanna, and if the rest of Team Free Wheel thinks they’re moving too fast, they don’t comment on it.

Bobby, for his credit, makes no comment on the new person living under his roof and accepts Cas into their lives like she’s always been there. It certainly helps that the perpetual frown that Deanna had taken to wearing leading up to the playoffs is replaced by a grin so wide that even Sammy complains makes her own cheeks hurt.

Of course with the addition of Cas, Deanna chooses to cede the position of jammer to her and take up blocking.

“You mean you’re actually willingly giving up being jammer?” Lisa asks with awe in her voice, as if she can’t believe that Deanna could yield a position she fought so hard to get in the first place.

“Can you even play another position?” Sammy jokes.

“Oh shut up, clearly Cas is the better skater here, and it would be pretty stupid of me if we didn’t use that to our advantage.”

“I don’t mind being a blocker, Deanna,” Cas says, and knowing her she’s completely okay with whatever Deanna wants her to do.

“You have no say in this.”

“Someone’s on a power trip. Did you finally remember that you’re the team captain? Or is it because Pamela isn’t here yet and you’ve got the seniority thing going on.”

“It’s called we’re going to the freaking championships and we’re the shitty team that Cas has the misfortune of being a part of to try to get that win.”

“I don’t think you’re a shitty team.”

“Thanks Cas, at least one of you has some faith in us.”

It’s kind of ridiculous how easily Cas fits into their team dynamic. Her intense focus during practices urges the rest of Team Free Wheel to give it their all. If anything, Deanna’s experience as a jammer makes her an excellent blocker. She finds the spots for Cas to get through the pack easily, and knows that places are the best for getting a jammer through.

Pamela takes to being solely a coach in stride, and is actually grateful that by the end of their training sessions she’s not dripping sweat like she would normally be.

 

Deanna doesn’t know what kind of reception they’ll get at Championships. There had been a lot of teams that had been eager to finally get a chance to face off against the Heavenly Hostess, and news of their disbandment had left a lot of people disappointed. Few of them knew that Cas had joined their team, and those that did know hardly believed it, and it left it as a rumor hardly believed by anyone until they showed up with what seemed an extra skater in tow.

There are a few people who do recognize Cas, partly due to the fact that she had featured on the WBTDA website so heavily when she was the skater of the month, and other people do a double take when they see her angel wing skates without the accompanying Heavenly Hostess get up.

Division 1 Championships last as long as playoffs, with just as many teams competing but the stakes higher. Their first match is against a Colorado team, and Deanna knows their match draws a heavy crowd, people eager to see what the new Team Free Wheel plays like, and if they really did deserve to come to championships.

The other team is good, but Team Free Wheel still manages to scrape a win. Considering that this is their first time officially skating as a team, Deanna thinks that they did great.

“I really think we can pull this off,” and Deanna really believes those words.

Her energy is contagious and before Deanna knows it, they are at the finals for Championships.

“Alright girls, this is it. We made it this far, and at this point I think there isn’t much that can stop us at this point. It’s been a tough week, but I’m proud of us, no matter the outcome, you are number one in my books.”

Their last match is against the Derby Dolls from Los Angeles, some of Deanna’s personal favorites as far as teams go. They’re the best of the best, and Deanna knows that Team Free Wheel is here less by skill and more by luck and the blessing that takes its form in Thursday’s Angel.

The game is the most intense that Deanna’s played in her whole skating career. While Team Free Wheel had been eliminated in the second and the first rounds the previous years, this is certainly that farthest they’ve come, and Deanna can almost taste victory. The other team is the defending champion, three years in a row, and they play with a certain confidence that only comes with having those wins under their belts.

If anything it spurs Deanna on. Their strong point is their blockers, which make it hard for Cas to get free of the pack in order to bust out her jammer skills. By the end of the first quarter the score is a mere twenty to seventeen, with the Derby Dolls holding a steady lead.

“We need to get Cas past those blockers, it’s the only chance we have at winning,” Deanna says as she wipes the sweat of her brow.

“Their blockers are scarily good though,” Charlie says, Lisa nodding in agreement.

“We can do this though, just get Cas through, and we’ve got this.”

They resume their spots on the track after the five-minute break between the first two quarters, and through some miracle, Cas is able to get past the pack. The crowd goes wild when they see what they’ve come to know as Thursday’s Angel actually get to show her skill on the track. She’s back at the back of the pack, making her way through before the other jammer can get past Sam at the front of the pack, and with Deanna and Lisa’s help she’s able to get through the pack once more.

It brings them into the lead for the first time during the bout, and Deanna can tell that it unsettles the other team slightly. The Derby Dolls are known for holding a steady lead throughout the game, and while other teams might get close, it’s rare that they actually get the upper hand, especially this early on in the game.

By the end of the second quarter Team Free Wheel is up by seven points, the largest margin in the game thus far, and even so the points scored are the lowest seen at championships. And while roller derby is a game where both teams are always on the offense and defense, there is a general consensus that the game being played on the track during this game is almost all defense.

The halftime break finds Team Free Wheel exhausted. Deanna doesn’t remember being this tired during a game ever.

“I don’t know how you girls manage to block during a whole game, it’s killing me out there,” Deanna says from where she’s lying on the floor, content with letting the sweat drip off her, not even bothering to raise her hand and wipe it off from where it’s threatening to get into her eyes.

“Yeah, but that out there, that isn’t blocking, that’s downright building a stockade and not letting anyone through,” Sam says, and despite being the tallest person on the track, she’s finding it difficult to make the other blockers budge.

“But you girls have the upper hand, you’ve shaken them up already, all we have to do is hold the lead.”

“That’s easier said than done, I’m freaking wiped,” Charlie says with emphasis and dramatically lets herself slump against Lisa, who is doing an impressive job of actually staying upright.

“I shouldn’t call the bout off as soon as I pass them, I think I can try to skate around them again, let the clock run,” Cas says, she’s looking at Deanna, asking for support.

The rest of the team know what that means though, it gives the other jammer a chance to possible score points. But if they block and don’t let her pass any of them, running the clock is certainly their best chance at keeping their lead.

“Cas has a point, I think we can do this, as long as we do our jobs and help Cas do hers…” Deanna says. She has faith in their team, and she knows that as long as they can open up a path for Cas, Cas will take the reins and lead them.

The half hour halftime doesn’t feel long enough, and they’re back on the track, ready to begin the last half of the game. It seems that while Team Free Wheel chose to take a more defensive route for the second half, the Derby Dolls have decided to play offense, and there is more stumbling and actual falls during the third quarter.

Deanna finds herself tripping often, but she manages to push the skater that she’s been assigned to block into the middle of the track a few times. It’s hard to keep sight of everyone on the track at all times, but the yells of her teammates and Pamela’s guiding yells tell her whenever Cas passes the pack. The Derby Dolls manage to close the gap between their scores in the third quarter, and the crowd is absolutely wild. There’s a pretty even split of yells and cheers from the crowd every time each team scores, and at this point in the game she’s sure that half the people are also cheering for both teams simply for a game well played.

“They’re killing us out there,” are the first words out of Charlie’s mouth when the five-minute break before the last quarter is called.

“And I might have sprained my ankle,” Lisa says, wincing as she rotates her left foot in her skate.

“How did I ever let you convince me into joining your roller derby team,” Sam complains to Deanna.

“We’re this close to winning, how can you not be more excited.” Pamela says, and she appears to be the only one who has more energy, of course, she’s also not had to skate a total of forty-five minutes with fifteen more to go.

“I’d be more excited if I didn’t feel like I am about to die,” and Charlie does look like the adrenaline rush of playing on a track is finally waning.

Deanna looks over at Cas, who has a look of fierce determination in her eye. It makes her even more determined than ever that they have to win this. Because even though Cas changed her views on what derby is about, Deanna has to at least meet her halfway and show Cas that they can still win. That Cas’ decision of moving two states over just to be on their derby team wasn’t a thing she’ll regret. Deanna wants to be able to give that to Cas, even just prove Naomi wrong.

“I want us to get back on that track and have fun. We’re going to have fun and damn if we don’t win, because I won’t let that happen. You girls have worked too hard, to get here, to help me get here. You didn’t have to join my derby team, but you girls did it anyway. And I don’t know how I’ll ever pay you back, but maybe I can give you girls this. This win.”

“Deanna, we’re here because we want to be. We wouldn’t be here if we didn’t want this as bad as you do,” Lisa says, voice filled with renewed energy.

“We complain a lot, but damn if we aren’t determined to take the trophy home with us,” Sammy says, raising a hand high for Charlie to high-five.

“I’ve totally already moved stuff around so we can put it on display at the rink, FYI,” Charlie says as she gets up to high-five Sam.

And it’s with a giddy resolve that they get back on the track. Despite the fact that Deanna has never skated so hard in her life, she’s also never had as much fun skating as she is right now.

Fifteen minutes pass in a blur, and before they know it, the last whistle goes off.

“They’ve done it, Team Free Wheel has beaten the Derby Dolls for the Championship! They are the winners!”

Deanna can barely hear herself think over the booming cheers of the crowd.

They’ve done it. They’ve won.

She can hardly tell where one teammate begins and the other ends, they are all just a mass of sweaty limbs and wide grins, and maybe the water on their faces isn’t all sweat.

“That’s one of the toughest games of derby I’ve seen played, and let me tell you, as a commentator I’ve seen a lot of games.”

Deanna can hardly hear the commentator over the continuous wall of sound that’s coming from the crowd and the sound of Queen’s “We Are the Champions” blasting from the loudspeakers.

The awards ceremony passes in almost a blur. Deanna thinks that this is where the montage happens in movies, she feels like she’s watching one. When the trophy is handed over they push Cas to take it, but she takes it and plops it right into Deanna’s arms. Deanna promptly takes it and shoves it in the general direction of her teammates before grabbing onto Cas and kissing her. The kiss is quick, their lips slick with spit and sweat, but damn if it doesn’t taste like hard earned victory.

“What do you think Naomi would say to that win?” Deanna practically yells into Cas’ ear.

“I think that she’s reevaluating her definition of fun.”

 

The after party is nothing like Deanna’s experienced.

Turns out Gaby and Anna actually made it out to watch the last match. “We knew that once Cas was on your team that the other teams didn’t stand a chance,” Gaby says with a grin before she takes Cas into a hug and Anna rolls her eyes.

“Hey, take good care of this girl, she’s important to me, if you break your heart I’ll kick your ass,” Gaby wags a finger at Deanna, before she lets Cas go and then disappears back into the crowd, Anna in tow.

 

_What is your derby name? Impala_

_Please explain the story and inspiration behind your derby name. My baby. In other words my 1967 Chevrolet Impala that was gifted to me when I was sixteen by my dad. We traveled a lot in her when I was a kid, and she went out of commission for a while. But my dad said she’d be mine if I fixed her up. I spent a good part of my teenaged life under that hood._

_What’s your number? 1967, my sister likes to say I’m a little too obsessed._

_What team(s) do you play on? The other one. I’m kidding. Team Free Wheel, all the way._

_Do you have a pre-bout ritual? Not really. We increase our training sessions, but other than that I would say no. Charlie likes to have us watch the latest bout of the team we’re playing up against, but it’s less of a ritual and more part of the training Charlie insists we do._

_What do you think about when you lace up your skates? I hope I don’t screw this up._

_Do you have a theme song? Ramble On, Led Zeppelin, easy._

_What is your pre-derby/sports background? Nothing. I tried yoga, but I’d never competed or participated in any sport before I tried on skates in my, er, in a family friend’s garage. Life changing._

“How’s that?”

Deanna lets Cas read over the email of her answers to the Featured Skater questions. They’d contacted her not even a week after the end of Championships. Apparently her skating on the track that day had been the best they’d seen in a while, and that’s saying a lot considering Deanna had seen a lot of good skating on that track.

“I think your fans will be glad they have more stuff on you.”

“Should I mention that I’m also banging the hottest jammer in the league, or do you think they’ve already figured that one out?”

“I think you’re pushing your limits,” but Cas leans down to kiss Deanna anyway.

There’s that light in her eye when she pulls away, and Deanna can feel her chest expanding. It’s been a crazy year, and a bumpy road, but she made it through and even got a new best friend who doubles as her really awesome girlfriend out of the whole thing. “I’m really proud of you.”

“I’m proud of us.”

And while that might sound really cheesy, this is Deanna’s life, it doesn’t really get any better than skating with your best friends, your sister, and your girlfriend on your team.

**Author's Note:**

> Deanna's Player Card  
>   
> Castielle's Player Card  
> 


End file.
